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January 25th, 2009, 03:44 PM
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I have a friend who I promised I would throw a shower if no one else would. Well turns out her mom is going to throw one which is great, because I am not as financially stable as I was when I made this promise. Her mom contacted me to get the names and addresses of her friends that she didn't have.

We're talking close to 80 people for this shower. I admit I am slightly jealous since for my first I never got a shower and my mom felt bad and throw me one for my second, about 15 people showed up.

Here's the deal though, this friend seems to think I should fork out money so she can have 2 baby showers for one baby. She seems to be under the impression that she should get 2 for some reason.

I flat out told her no and that I thought she was being very greedy. I think I may have really hurt her feelings.

What do you guys think? Am I wrong? It just seems so extream to have a shower with 80+ people and expect a second. I'm so insulted by her I am tempted not to even go.
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January 26th, 2009, 10:11 AM
anjelt's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,299
If everyone is coming to the one shower I do not see a need for a second shower! I do not think you are wrong. I ended up throwing all three of my showers but I have parents that are divorced and then I threw a friend shower. I have no sisters, and my sister in laws are too wrapped up in themselves, even though I threw them both baby showers and my aunt got sick just before the showers there fore I ended up throwing my own.
Angel mommy to Kenna Cole now 2 years old and ruling the roost!!! I need a new siggie!!!
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January 26th, 2009, 02:36 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: New York
Posts: 814
I don't have a problem with mulitply showers if different people are invited to them. We always do one at school for teacher who are having babies and I'm sure they have seperate ones for non-work friends. But it does seem excessive to have more than one with the same people. Does she know that you passed on name to her mom?

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January 31st, 2009, 12:33 PM
kayexcited's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 491
Maybe you could plan the shower together with her mom?
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February 1st, 2009, 07:29 PM
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 213
No, you are not wrong. Multiple baby showers are pretty common now. I know that I had several for my second, but generally, there is a different guest list for each one. I would either cohost a shower with her mom, like kayexcited said, or I would simply explain to her that it just isn't in the cards.

A great way to make her happy and keep you out of the proverbial "dog house" is to have a special day for mom and a few close friends. Go get a facial or have a makeup party, something very small where she can have her second "shower" and you don't have to fight with her.

Of course, that is only a suggestion and if you can't afford it or don't feel comfortable with it, don't do it.

Senior Writer for www.baby-shower.com
My first book will be coming out in 2010, hopefully just in time for baby #3.
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February 8th, 2009, 07:24 PM
JulieMc's Avatar Loving my babies. :)
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 9,004
Since you already passed on names to her mom, I see no reason to have a second. As she as the mommy-to-be really has no say in it.... she shouldn't even be asking, its bad manners, IMO.

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