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teens and topless sunbathing

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June 26th, 2009, 07:38 AM
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 2
just wanted to know how other moms would have reacted.

My DD is 15 and Ive no problem with her sunbathing in th garden w/o a bikini top. the garden is completley private and can only bee seen from our house. Ive talked with her about always using and reapplying sunscreen, and shes not allowed to sunbathe during the middle of the day, only after 3pm. Ive never know her to do it while DH is in the house.

Anyway, a friend of mines two daughters were over (9 and 16), while I was out. and DD and friend (16) decided to sunbath topless for an hour. Not a big deal I didnt think, until my friend rang me, outraged that her daughter had been topless sunbathing and that it is 'allowed' in my house. she went on a rant about what would have happened if DH had come home (he was at work) and how it was totally innappropriate for her younger daughter (my two younger daughters were also there).

i let her rant and told her to tell her daughter not to do it again, but that I would still allow my daughter to do it. she seemed completley shocked by my reaction, as I was by hers
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June 26th, 2009, 09:56 AM
Cindermella's Avatar Freakin Know it all
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 13,606
Its never been an issue here and I have 4 teen girls currently.
But mine are mindful that melanoma runs in our family
and they are painfully shy when it comes to being naked

elenor 14 says i am a jerk for telling you that.

I am the "who" when you call, "Who's there?"

I put the "D" in lysdexia

Sanity is a cozy lie.

Click here to remember Donovan
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June 26th, 2009, 10:23 AM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
Posts: 115,722
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Never been an issue and thankfully my only daughter is an adult so I doubt I'll ever have an issue.
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June 27th, 2009, 07:54 AM
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 2
Originally Posted by Cindermella View Post

and they are painfully shy when it comes to being naked
My 11 yearold is also very shy about her body and I doubt she will ever be in a bikini!
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June 27th, 2009, 01:49 PM
Lisadear's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Trinidad
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I've never had to deal with that but I wouldn't have an issue with it either

Actually I think your friend was downright RUDE to you ... and I must commend you that you weren't rude back to her (cause I know I would have lost it and told her off)

I'm sure at her house there MIGHT be some things which are the norm there to do that you nor other parents might approve of ... rules are different in every household but that doesn't mean chewing out someone else about it

NOW she can TEACH her daughter about the fact that SHE thinks sunbathing is 'wrong' and that she thinks it's inappropriate ... that's HER job as the child's mother

I do see why she's upset but its in no way right for her to call you and 'tell you off' ... she was out of place in that ... venting her frustrations and letting you know she was displeased is one thing, telling you off was another and as I said before RUDE

xxx Lisa xxx
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June 30th, 2009, 09:06 PM
homemakermommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 8,018
Hmmm I don't know how I feel about this one. My dd is almost 16 now and while she wears a bikini I know she wouldn't go topless. She's one of those hide in the corner and cover up when changing types. I would not have issue with her sunbathing at my home topless but I wouldn't want her to do it at someone elses house unless I was really comfortable with them and it had been discussed ahead of time. It sounds like in this instance though you were out and if she let her come over without an adult present then what can she expect. You can't control what they do when your not there and she should hold her daughter responsible for her decisions.
Kim- wife to Kevin mom to Ashley, Julianna, Marinah, and Delaney
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