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Hi. Could use a little support

Forum: Pregnancy Loss


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June 25th, 2009, 08:18 AM
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: St. Augustine FL
Posts: 13
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Hi everyone. I am here looking for a bit of support, I have it here at home and with family but it seems that no one wants to listen to what I have to say. All I hear is "Stay Positive" Well, that is kinda hard for me at the moment!
A little background:
I am supposed to be around 8.5 weeks pregnant. I have my dates right! I am sick of people telling me maybe my dates are off...they are not.
I went in for my first u/s 2 weeks ago, I had it early because I had an ectopic pregnancy in the past and my Dr. wanted to make sure bean was in the right place this time. Everything seemed ok. As far as my calculations go I should have been 6 weeks 4 days at that time. I was measuring at 5 weeks. The Dr. never even mentioned that, so I am assuming it is not that big a deal.
This past monday I started spotting, just in the morning after I go to the bathroom, just a tiny amount of dark blood when I wipe. Didn't think anything of it, I know this happens sometimes. Tuesday it happened again and since I was going into the hospital anyway to drop off a urine test (high BP) I called and told the nurse what was happeneing and she had me come in for another ultra sound. There was no heart beat. At this point I should have been somewhere around 8 weeks, I knew the second I saw the u/s that something was not right, there should have been more. The midwife on duty told me that there was progress from last weeks u/s to this weeks. That there was a fetal pole now where there wasn't before. But I was only measuring at 5.4 weeks.
I am supposed to go back in on July 6th to see if there is any progress.
I am still spotting every morning and a little here and there through out the day. No cramping though.
I just can't understand why they wouldn't give me some blood tests to check if my levels are going up? And waiting 2 weeks! I just am so upset because it seems like noone is taking me seriously! I'm not sure if I should just go on like everything is fine or start preparing myself for the worst. The midwife was so neutral with everything she said..."at least there is progress but I am worried that the dates aren't matching" I mean, is that good or bad??
Anyway, thanks for listening to me whine...I needed to get that out.
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June 25th, 2009, 09:51 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,090
I'm sorry you are going through this It's pretty close to what happened to me with my most recent loss. I was supposed to be about 8 or 9 weeks (I can't remember anymore and I just don't want to think about it enough to remember exactly) and the ultrasound was only showing 6 weeks. Everyone kept telling me that my dates must be off which I hated hearing because I know my dates, I know when I ovulated and I know the last time dh and I had bd which would have put me at at least 8 weeks not 6. It still makes me angry. Up until the day I miscarried in the hospital people kept telling me my dates must be off...

I'm hoping that in your case everything will turn out fine but if it doesn't we're here for you.

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June 25th, 2009, 11:20 AM
SheilaRN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Dallas, Oregon
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Did you mention that at the last U/s you were measuring pretty much the same as the 1st one? That does seem a bit strange. I think I might have pressed the matter wiht the nurse or OB and asked their opinion. Is this common or should you be concerned.

Could you possilby call another Dr's office and ask the advice nurse on hand?
I'm sorry. I know this must be a very confusing time. Not knowing is the worst then to be spotting on top of it all.
I'll be thinking abo ut you today.
Keep us updated.

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June 25th, 2009, 01:17 PM
Kary♥RN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: PA
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I am so sorry you have to go through this. HUGS.. I wish I had more to say.. I now this is hard, the not knowing part. KUP HUGS....

Thank you GraysMama For my BEAUTIFUL Siggy!!!

BFP 11/09/08 M/C 11/11/08 BFP 01/02/09 M/C 01/29/09 BFP 08/26/09 M/C 10/02/09 Missing our 3 Angles
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June 25th, 2009, 03:51 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,573
It's so hard when you feel like nobody is listening to you. I had a hard time convincing the nurse i called about Cora that it wasn't just her "slowing down" in preparation for delivery. It's so hard, when they make you feel like they don't think you know what you are talking about.

I hope that they're right though. But if they're not...we're here for you no matter what happens.
Thanks to babydoll213 for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog

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June 25th, 2009, 03:58 PM
momof8lopez's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: illinois
Posts: 8,894
your right, hearing it constantly that the "dates are off", is so irratable. You know when you ovulated and you know when your last af was, so yes your right, I would be concerned that there was little progress from the last u/s. At this point, you can prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Unfortunately, there are no quick answers with this process. There is not one Dr. that will give you a definite prognoses until he/she has sufficient evidence to prove it either way. Since there was some progess, that is why the nurse is being caustious saying that it is concerning about the dates being off. But if you had two different u/s's and two different techs do them, then a third one will be the determining factor for you. They could do blood draws, but usually when they start doing u/s's to confirm viablility, they dont go back to blood tests, as the u/s is more reliable to confirm viability.

I say trust your gut instinct on this. Most women have that inner voice telling them this is a good pregnancy or something is just not right.

Im sorry you are going through this roller coaster of a ride, and pray that your answers come quicker than the next u/s brings. KUP, and I will pray for some peace for you.....
momma of 8 beautiful children now. Most recent is Jerry Jr. born 11/19/12 at 37wk, 7lbs 6oz and 19.5inches and Baby Reymundo born 10/7/13 at 35w6d, 6lbs 7oz, 19.5 inches. Momma of 5 angels. New siggy to come!

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June 25th, 2009, 04:28 PM
sportsmom2's Avatar Pregnant with #3
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 554
I know exactly what you are going through. Last week, I began having slight spotting (brownish) and very light cramping (so light I was wondering if it was all in my head since I saw the spotting). Anyway, that was Wednesday night. My DH was completely positive thinking that maybe I was being dramatic and worrying over nothing. I was 6 wks 2 days at the time. All day Thursday, I drank water like crazy thinking that maybe I was dehydrated or something. The cramping and spotting continued. I finally called the doctor Thursday afternoon and after practically begging them, they agreed to "fit me in" on Friday.

So Friday everything is still the same, spotting and light cramping. But... in my gut, I knew something was wrong. I had no pregnancy symptoms and since I do have 2 other children, I knew how it felt to "feel pregnant". I didn't feel it at all.

So the doctor agree's with me about being concerned over my symptoms and does a vaginal ultrasound. I can tell you that my heart sank when he couldn't see a sac or anything on the monitor. I knew there should be one there with even a slight possibility of seeing a heartbeat... but there was nothing.

That's when he began to discuss the possibility of my dates being off.... I KNOW what you mean when you say it's frustrating to hear. I know when me and my DH have been together and I know when my last cycle was. My dates were correct.

But he did take my blood to compare it with 2 days prior when I had my 1st visit.

I tried to believe there was hope... but in my heart and gut, I knew this pregnancy was not going to be ok.

On Sunday, I began bleeding bright red blood and Sunday night I had a miscarriage. On Monday I got my HCG levels back and it showed the decrease in HCG levels from Wednesday to Friday. So, if I had known those levels on Friday, I would've been more prepared for my experience on Sunday.

I think doctor's are cautious for various reasons, but mainly because they want to leave room for error and give the mom a little hope until all hope is gone.

I will pray that you and your baby will be ok. Keep us updated. But listen to your heart, you know your body best.
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June 26th, 2009, 07:54 PM
JessP's Avatar Lovin life and family
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The ultra sounds being 2 weeks apart and only showing progress of less than a week would concern me. I heard the dates off question alot with my first child and nothing is exact. I hope everything turns out. I do think we know even when we don't want to admit that something isn't right. I knew my last pregnancy was different somehow but never imagined we would lose the baby. Follow your instincts. Hugs and support for you.

Thanks .:Shortcake:. for my great siggie

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June 27th, 2009, 08:06 PM
..Penelope..'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 10,777
I'm so sorry that you're going through this, hon. You and baby are in my T&P.

Missing our angel baby since Feb 7, 2009

BeaMade for unique, adorable, high quality handmade crochet hats and booties, velcro free soother clips and soft sole baby boots.
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