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Forum: Pregnancy Loss


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August 11th, 2012, 07:46 PM
Kalynas_Mom's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 830
Nice to meet all of you but wish it wasn't under these circumstances.

I might ramble so forgive me in advance.

On August 6th I started spotting. On August 7th I saw the heartbeat (it was relatively slow at 86 but still going). On August 8th, exactly 3 weeks after finding out I was pregnant and 7 weeks along I passed the fetus (gestational sac fully intact and all).

I knew in my heart something was wrong from the beginning. I never really go to church but I visited my priest a week prior and I wasn't sure why, but I am so glad I did.

No one in my immediate family or even DH fully understand the magnitude of the pain i'm feeling. I was only aware I was pregnant for 3 weeks and no it was not planned....but that was my baby. The baby who one morning had a heartbeat and that night had none. I have a daughter who I love and cherish and in so many ways that has made it easier....and in other ways made it even harder because I know the joys of parenthood and won't be doing it this time around.

I was convinced that I was doing fine and at peace but i'm not. I haven't left the house (i'm a busy body and always want to be out doing something), I cry constantly and I haven't eaten in 3 days. I knew I loved that baby....I guess I just didn't know how much until I was completely and utterly heart broken and lost. In 3 weeks I feel in love, and in a couple of moments it was over.

Please tell me this gets easier
Mom to my wildchild Kalyna (Dec 2008)

August 8th 2012, 7 weeks
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August 11th, 2012, 09:03 PM
pearlica's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,442
I'm so sorry for you loss Tanya. This is still very new to me so I cant speak for how long it takes before it starts getting easier. But I just wanted to say that I know how you feel. I dont think my husband understands either how invested I got so instantly in the baby. I had imagined a whole life that involved this new little one. I thought of the new baby all day long every day. I was so excited for T to be a big sister and to tell our family about the newest arrival. Guys seem to bond later in the pregnancy and I just dont think they get the connection we have that occurs instantly.

I tend to stress eat so I'm doing the opposite and eating more than I should to make myself feel "happy" and then just feeling gross afterwards. I have been keeping busy though and that has helped. I've had lots of family events and even though I just want to lay around and mope its been nice once I actually get out. I'm sorry you are hurting so much. Sending cyber hugs!!
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August 11th, 2012, 11:06 PM
sweety_pie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 10,823
So so sorry!! I could have wrote your post as I feel the exact same way. I thought I was doing good right after, but it slowly seems to get worse. I'm hoping it does get easier, because I swear I have no tears left to cry! I hope we can all come to some kinda peace! HUGS!

{Aug/07/201212 weeks} {Oct/29th/20127 weeks}
Forever missing my Mom...

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August 12th, 2012, 08:22 AM
Kalynas_Mom's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 830
Thanks ladies. I wish neither of you could commiserate with me because it makes me so sad that other people are feeling this pain (but i'm so glad for your kind words right now ) Sending lots of hugs to both of you and many thanks again for your replies
Mom to my wildchild Kalyna (Dec 2008)

August 8th 2012, 7 weeks
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August 12th, 2012, 03:33 PM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 14,600
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I'm sorry for your loss. It is really difficult, but try to take care of yourself.. eating well, resting, all that will definitely help you recover emotionally as well as physically. Give yourself permission to grieve in any way YOU need to. Everybody deals with things differently, and that's okay. You will get through it.
~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 20 Raechel: 18 Daniel: 15 Joseph: 13 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 7 Lucy Marie: 5 John Anthony: 2 AND Baby due Dec. 2015

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w); Francis (7-4-12 @12w); Charlie (1-19-15 @ 6w)

Congratulations Raechel and Kaleb, married May, 2015

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August 13th, 2012, 05:41 AM
.:Shortcake:.'s Avatar ♬♪Music Soothes my Soul♪♬
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 17,624
I'm so very sorry for your loss. I can tell you the grief does get easier to deal with and the tears will come less often. But the pain of losing your child will never go away. What your feeling right now is normal, and is a natural part of the grieving process. Allow yourself to feel this way.

My Angels- 12-15-08 @ 13w3d♥ 05-09 @ 6w2d♥ & 2 Early Losses♥ Twins 9-7-10♥ & 10-2-10 ♥ 2/11/11

Expecting my baby boy May 9th
Emergency cerclage put in 12/24

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