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my sister had her baby..


Forum: Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
April 16th, 2007, 06:56 AM
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im thrilled i love my neice so much already and i love holding her and dressing her and even changeing her diaper! but on the other hand, im sad that i dont have my babys and it hurts a little to see my mom holding dakota and knowing that i was supposed to give her her first grandchild and i didnt... .......my mom keeps snapping at me when my sister needs something like get her this now! no not like that! and i just want to scream sometimes cuz i dont know its like im in shock seeing the baby sometimes and i just stand around with a dumb look on my face ..i want to tell my mom im upset because this is lke a slap in the face but i dont want to ruin everyones happy moods so ill keep it to myself ...
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  #2  
April 16th, 2007, 07:01 AM
ange2006's Avatar Veteran
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I know that's gotta be hard. I'm waiting for that to happen to me. My brother is having a baby in June. I'm scared now even thinking about holding the baby. I know when I see her I'm going to ball my eyes out. I hope it gets better. Your mom should understand and your sister. Take some time away from the new baby and relax to get your feelings back in check. That might help a little. Sorry, I don't have more to say. But until I experience it I don't know what to say except I'm sorry.
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  #3  
April 16th, 2007, 07:12 AM
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I'm sorry sweetie. Its understandable that your having a hard time right now and you wish that you had your little ones with you right now. Seeing someone else with their child/ren, when your missing your own is the most hardest thing anyone can go through.

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  #4  
April 16th, 2007, 07:45 AM
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thanks girls
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  #5  
April 16th, 2007, 07:48 AM
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I know what you mean. My sister had her second baby two days before I found out for sure that my baby had died. (I knew it was a possibilty at that time). I think it is good that you didn't say how you felt around everyone but I also think they should be a little more understanding of what you may be going through. Maybe you could sit down with just your mom and tell her that while you love your new neice and are happy for your sister you can't help but feel sad and miss your own babies. Tell her you just need a hug and some understanding while you go through this time. I know it is hard. I was soo happy for my sister and love my new nephew to pieces but I had plans for our babies to grow up the same age and for my sister and I to push strollers around the park and now that is not going to happen. Her baby is going to be a toddler by the time I have my first. It is kind of bittersweet because you want to be happy but you want your babies as well. I wish I could say more to help you feel better but I think this is something that will just get easier with time. Hopefully in the meantime you can get some support from your family.
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  #6  
April 16th, 2007, 08:10 AM
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Quote:
I know what you mean. My sister had her second baby two days before I found out for sure that my baby had died. (I knew it was a possibilty at that time). I think it is good that you didn't say how you felt around everyone but I also think they should be a little more understanding of what you may be going through. Maybe you could sit down with just your mom and tell her that while you love your new neice and are happy for your sister you can't help but feel sad and miss your own babies. Tell her you just need a hug and some understanding while you go through this time. I know it is hard. I was soo happy for my sister and love my new nephew to pieces but I had plans for our babies to grow up the same age and for my sister and I to push strollers around the park and now that is not going to happen. Her baby is going to be a toddler by the time I have my first. It is kind of bittersweet because you want to be happy but you want your babies as well. I wish I could say more to help you feel better but I think this is something that will just get easier with time. Hopefully in the meantime you can get some support from your family. [/b]

thats exactly how i feel! i was due in march she was due the month after but i miscarried..but i always thought wow our kids could have grown up together and now they wont
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  #7  
April 16th, 2007, 11:16 AM
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Congrats to your sister, I know you were worried about her baby. I am happy to hear that she is healthy and happy. I know it is hard. I have the same problem with my sister. Her new baby is gorgeous and she doesn't appreciate her at all and would rather be out partying with friends then spending time with her precious little one. It has torn our relationship apart. I know you and your sister will always have a great relationship but maybe you should talk with you Mom about it. Perhaps she doesn't understand how you are feeling right now. People tend to get swept up when I new baby arrives and she probably just isn't thinking about your feelings right now which is wrong. Of course you are upset. Hang in there.
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  #8  
April 16th, 2007, 06:58 PM
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  #9  
April 17th, 2007, 08:02 PM
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I don't know that I can say much more than what everyone else said. I know that you have been "dreading" this moment since you found out about your loss. At the same time, it is hard to not be happy for your sister & those conflicting emotions are difficult to deal w/. My best advice has already been given. Sit down w/ just your mom & explain to her how you have been feeling & why you seem out of it at times. Maybe she will understand. My heart goes out to you. Maybe it is time for me to send the strength stone back your way.



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  #10  
April 18th, 2007, 12:48 PM
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I can't imagine how you feel sweetie. I'm so sorry
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  #11  
April 19th, 2007, 07:57 AM
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Quote:
I don't know that I can say much more than what everyone else said. I know that you have been "dreading" this moment since you found out about your loss. At the same time, it is hard to not be happy for your sister & those conflicting emotions are difficult to deal w/. My best advice has already been given. Sit down w/ just your mom & explain to her how you have been feeling & why you seem out of it at times. Maybe she will understand. My heart goes out to you. Maybe it is time for me to send the strength stone back your way.



Love you![/b]
thanks astrid! and no way you have to keep the stone till you get your baby, then pass it on to someone else whos having troubles
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  #12  
April 20th, 2007, 03:46 PM
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Ok, I'll keep the stone ONLY if you promise that when I have my baby, you will take it back if you haven't. If you happen to already be pg, then I will send it to someone else in need. Stay strong sweetie!
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  #13  
April 20th, 2007, 06:24 PM
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Ok, I'll keep the stone ONLY if you promise that when I have my baby, you will take it back if you haven't. If you happen to already be pg, then I will send it to someone else in need. Stay strong sweetie![/b]

ok its a deal
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