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Forum: Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
May 13th, 2007, 10:09 PM
SheilaRN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think we sometimes get so busy posting to all the topics that we never really get to catch up with one another. It's kinda nice to see how everyone is doing in their every day to day life.


It's been 6 mo since we lost Annika and every month I seem to be just a bit more "normal". I really feel like I'm in touch with things again. Dh and I are closer than ever and hope to be pg soon.

Work has been busy but my schedule is easing up a bit now that we have a supervisor and I won't have to help manage the office .
We still have our exchange student Michel. Since the weather has been amazing lately, we've been trying to get outside to hike and show him the beautiful scenery of Oregon before he goes home to Switzerland.

DH is still busy with school and now softball. I decided not to play this year but am contimplating taking an art class or two during the summer. I figured I would be better off indoors instead of outdoors sneezing all the time

Not much else is going on right now. I'm sure once summer hits the weekends will be filled with camping, trips to the beach, BBQ's and parties at our house along with 3+weddings, baby showers and hopefully a BFP for me.

How are things going with each of you??
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  #2  
May 14th, 2007, 02:54 AM
Marissa's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It's been 1 month since we lost our baby.

While its been hard, i'm finding a new level of "normal" with the exception of a few bad days like on saturday night when i cried. It's still quite hard to handle some days but i'm getting there. Work has been a great distraction and have my boyfriend's son here every 2nd weekend has helped too.

We start TTC again next cycle. I have had AF since my miscarriage and how now left my house. And I'm hopeing after next cycle, i won't have to see her again for sometime (want to be pregnant again). Buddy and I are doing great, too. We have a much closer bond then we had before our miscarriage. We were close before but this has made us even closer, and he has been a strong rock for me month. I seriously don't know what i would have done without him.

He gave me pink roses, for mothers day. I wasn't expecting anything. After crying on saturday night, i forgot what day it was when i woke up & there they were, sitting on the kitchen bench. He said he couldn't not acknowledge my first mothers day. It was the most beautiful thing, ever. My sister had sights in mind to ruin the day, which almost happened until i got home and seen those flowers again, and realized that she wasn't going to ruin this day.


So all in all, we're doing good.
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  #3  
May 14th, 2007, 08:12 AM
linbein's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I don't know, I'm not doing so well right now. I mean, all in all, life is good. Mother's Day was nice. Kiley is literally the light of my life, and I know that if I did not have her, I would be lost right now.
DH got me some beautiful pink roses and a really nice card for Mother's Day. He and I are really close right now. I keep chalking that up to the fact that I am hormone free for the first time in years! (no bc in system!)
I'm just frustrated. My D&C was 2 months ago, and I'm already on AF #2. My last cycle ended up only being 22 days long. I used to be 29 days like clock work. The m/c has really messed with my system. I'm worried that this will really effect my chances of conceiving again, especially since my luteal phase is short. I'm most likely going to end up talking with the doc and getting some help. I don't want to do that, but I don't want to waste too much more time either. I just want to be pregnant again. I was really hoping that it would happen fast like it did the last 2 times. I mean, when we got pregnant before the m/c, all it took was literally ONCE in January! Now this past cycle, I thought I had it all timed right...but no go...AF came full force yesterday.
Last cycle, it looks like I O'd around CD12...so if that happens again this month, next week is our window! DH is on his midnight shift, so I was worried we wouldn't even be able to try this month. We hardly see each other much less get any alone time when he is on this shift. He said "Look, just come home and wake me up, then go get Kiley from daycare." I was like "Really? You don't mind?" He said "of course not!" hehehe! I hate to make him feel like he's just being used as a stud horse next week, but I'm really serious about this. At least he doesn't seem to mind. hehehehe
I'm just frustrated I guess...I keep thinking of how I should be 4 months pregnant right now, not struggling to TTC again.
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  #4  
May 14th, 2007, 09:03 AM
ange2006's Avatar Veteran
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I am doing ok. Mothers Day was hard for me. I should be an almost to be mother!!!! It's frustrating. I went bike riding with my parents Sunday morning then went to DH's parents for dinner. DH's nieces kept asking me when I was having the baby and then her mom said she was sorry for her daughter and talked to her. Then after that she kept repeating that my baby died inside of me and I wasn't having a baby. I hated that. I just felt like Sh_t!!! I just started crying. Then DH's mom told the kids to stop and tried to help them eat. I was devastated. When I start to feel better I get knocked down hard. DH and I are ok. I've been moody and don't know why. It's also hard money wise now. But we are going on vacation the week of memorial day!!! So I'm looking forward to that!!! Just being able to relax and ride my 4-wheeler and have some drinks and have fun. I just need to let go a little. I hope I'll be able to do that. And hopefully after we come back it will get better for me and DH.
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  #5  
May 14th, 2007, 11:35 AM
dee68's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I THINK I am doing ok.......feeling down off & on. I keep thinking I should be preparing right now for next weekend, which was suppose to be my due date (the 19th). I was cleaning upstairs last week and saw the crib in the closet & almost lost it.
I dread checking the mail...everyday I get something that has to do with having a baby....magazines,diaper,lotion,and wipe samples....portrait offers.
If I do get pregnant again, I will not sign up for all of those offers until I am well into the pregnancy. Its just to difficult to get this stuff daily !!

sorry for rambling !!! All in all I guess I am ok,but like all of you, there are good days & bad.


hugs to all of you!

Dee
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  #6  
May 14th, 2007, 12:29 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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Mother's Day was kind of hard for me too. Ugh. It should have been my second Mother's Day celebrating my baby girl. Instead it's my second one mourning her. I went to church, but as they were talking about mothers at the pulpit I had no idea where I fit it. There are the "non" mothers: the ones who've never been pregnant or anything, the "expectant" mothers: those who are pregnant for the first time, and the "experienced" mothers: those who have other children, and if they're pregnant it's the second or more pregnancy. Where do I fit in that?

I'm doing okay. My last day of antibiotics is tomorrow, and hopefully the UTI is gone...but I'm still having random contractions. I worry about this baby so much. I just want her to make it to delivery. I hate that I feel my womb is not a safe place for her. She's really active though, and doing extremely well. I really have no reason to worry...except for the fact that her sister didn't make it.

My emotions are so up and down lately. I'll chalk it up to hormones.


I finished Cora's scrapbook, since I finally got all the pictures we took of her printed and such. When I get the internet back at my apartment, I'll take pictures of my pages to show you ladies.
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  #7  
May 14th, 2007, 02:44 PM
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I'm doing pretty well. I haven't been on this board in forever. I've been so consumed with TTC and I need to take a step back before I lose my mind. I'm on my 3rd cycle since my m/c and my cycles are still a little off - but not too bad. I was so certain I would be pregnant by now that I am kind of at a loss for why it's not happening. I mean it happened so quickly last time (1st month trying) so I just assumed it would happen again like that. Anyhow, I'm learning to be more patient - but fall off the wagon from time to time.

Also, I got invited to DH's cousin's baby shower in a couple of weeks - I'm opting not to go. If that makes me selfish, so be it, because deep down, I can't do it and I know I would ruin it for alot of people there. I mean I bawled for 2 days when I got the invite.

Other than that, trying to stay busy with work and other things. DH and I just started going to Detroit Tigers games, so that helps keep our social calendars fuller than normal.
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  #8  
May 14th, 2007, 04:13 PM
spicymustard's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I was doing better. I'm lucky to have a great class this year with a mix of disabilities. Most of the time my aide and I spend most of the day laughing with them. They are characters. I am thankful I was blessed with a neat class like that this year rather than a class filled with kids with anger managment issues, which I 've had in the past.

Our marriage is stronger than ever. My husband has been increadbly understanding.

And then we got another + and we were very excited but now I've started spotting and I wonder if I should have waited. Not because I think my body wasn't recovered from the last m/c but because I wonder if I really was emotionally ready like I thought I was.
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  #9  
May 14th, 2007, 04:31 PM
docsmomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Mothers day was really hard for me. I found out my best friend from church had a mc on Friday. It was her 1st pg. So when they were having all the kids get flowers for thier moms, she was crying. I asked her what was going on and she said she was crying because no one sees that she's still a mom. DS heard this and went and asked for a flower and gave it to her.

He then said "Auntie (he calls her auntie) your babies in heaven with mommies babies, don't worry."

I broke down then. But overall I'm doing ok...
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  #10  
May 14th, 2007, 04:45 PM
Nadine41's Avatar Veteran
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I'm just taking it each day at a time. Sometimes I have to go hour by hour, my emotions are so overwhelming some days. I had a real rough time emotionally Mother's Day. I just could not be happy. Everyone kept asking me if I was sick, because I was so quiet.
I went back to weight watchers to try to lose some weight before we TTC again, and I have be so diligent about keeping track and counting points, and them when I stepped on the scale I only had lost.8 pounds. I stayed for the meeting and I had to keep choking back tears.
It didn't help that my irresponsible neice was up for Mother's Day. This is her first and she is just a "kid" who just does not get it. Her mom said to me that she has had to get after her about how she talks to the baby and shows anger toward her. The sweet thing is only 6 1/2 months old. I'm sorry I'm rambling, today is not a good day. I am feeling rather down.
On top of it I have to go to a board meeting adn I am hoping that my pregnant friend that I have been avoiding will not be there because I think I'll lose it if I look at her belly.
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  #11  
May 14th, 2007, 08:15 PM
irishxrose
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Mother's Day was extremely hard for me. DF and I got into a fight, Joshua was extremely cranky, and the sadness of losing my baby was tremendous. I just wanted to stay in bed and cry.

Other than that, I am healing in my own way. It's hard getting up every day, but I do it for my son... he needs his mommy.
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