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December 23rd, 2011, 01:09 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 932
my question has to do with modesty, im not wanting to start any debates, but I have just started wearing a skirt and dresses instead of pants, My daughter is 8 and I would like her to follow suit, because Im not liking any of the pants or shirts for that matter that they have these days, how would you go about this?
Take all her pants away or explain the reasoning, or both?
she is a very strong willed child and almost everything she does is an arguement first.

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December 24th, 2011, 11:15 AM
Countrymom4's Avatar Chrystal
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Saskatchewan, Canada
Posts: 3,639
I would wear them and set the example. I would then think your daughter would follow. Just maybe not tomorrow.

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December 24th, 2011, 11:53 AM
mamma_anna's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 1,953
First of all, Hi. Welcome to the board. I'm glad you posted in here.

Second, I have 4 daughters so I can completely relate to your delema. I really don't like a lot of the stuff that's out there these days either. Instilling modesty in our girls is definitely a challenge.

What is it about pants specifically that you object to? I'm just asking because in my expirience, unless you're willing to make them yourself, (which I am definitely not able to do) finding modest skirts and dresses in the stores is a whole lot more difficult than finding a decent pair of pants. Just my

If I were you, I wouldn't take anything away or try to force her to wear anything. It sounds like thats likely to make her rebel. I would explain your reasoning and then take her shopping. Do some window shopping or internet browsing first so you know where to find stuff you approve of. Give her as many choices as you can within your rules. With my girls at least, the more choices I give the less likely we are to argue.

When my older girls buy something I don't approve of, they have to convince me why they think it's appropriate. ("All my friend's are wearing it." doesn't count) If they can't convince me, it gets returned. End of story. We've only had to go that far twice so far. It helps that they wear school uniforms most of the time.

Hope this helps a little. Good luck!

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December 25th, 2011, 07:40 PM
Mattiez's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,422
I personally don't mind my daughter wearing, pants, shorts, skirts or what ever. When they get too tight they go away.

I definitely wouldn't take them away all at once. That will only cause a big fight and make her resentful of you. What I would do would be to get her some nice skirts or dresses that she would really like and give them to her for Christmas or just because she needs more clothes. I would take the opportunity to go through her clothes and get rid of anything that was too small or worn or she doesn't wear. In about 1 year she will outgrow most her clothes and need new ones anyway. Now slowly, over the next year as she outgrows or wears out the old ones, I would replace the older pants with cute dresses and skirts. Transitions take time. If you look at it in a long term, life-long way of dressing, just think, when she is 16, you want her to be a happy, loving, self-respecting, modest young lady. A year is not a long time to transition into a different mind set.
I won't give her the whole lecture of why at one time ether. Bring it up bit by bit as circumstances arise.

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December 26th, 2011, 08:18 AM
Mami's Avatar Christian Parent
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 5,740

I agree with Anna here. Its more difficult to find dresses/skirts that are modest nowadays. Seriously have you been to the Junior section and even for little girls as well. I always buy Jocy a size or two up because I dont like short dresses. I dont like that when she bends down, you see her little undies. I always hem up the big dresses so it fits her.

i dont see nothing wrong with pants but if you do then I would go as suggested replace old pants with dresses and jeans. Eventually she will get the hang of it if you live by example. Its hard to adjust to that if she isnt ready. Give her time and she will come around if thats what you want.

Thank you JMC1988 for the beautiful siggy!

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