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Violence Doesn't Solve Anything


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  #1  
June 21st, 2006, 06:46 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Overland Park, Kansas
Posts: 717
An honest question here, I thought this would be a good place to ask as it may turn into a debate.

We are always brought up with the notion of "Violence doesn't solve anything" right? But what do countries do when they have major problems with their neighbors? They kill them. It's something I've never understood. We are raised not to fight...but then we sign up to fight for our country...to FIGHT for our country when something goes wrong or they do something we don't agree with.

Does this seem contradictory to you?

Thanks for the responses and shedding some light on this subject for me Maybe I'm just not seeing the "bigger" picture here
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  #2  
June 21st, 2006, 06:57 PM
Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 5,429
It would be nice if the world could be without violence, but it's never gonna happen. So to maintain peace and protect our freedom, people sign up for the military. They don't sign up because they want to 'fight'. We have to have a way to protect our country from terrorists and other countries. The military is the only way to do that.
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  #3  
June 22nd, 2006, 03:53 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,496
We make a point to try and stay away from absolutes in our parenting; things like "never talk to strangers" and "violence never solves anything" are not things you hear us saying.

There are times when the path to negociation has blood along the way. The actual problem will be solved when treaties are signed and rules and regulations are agreed to; unfortunatly, especially (and to many, it is ONLY acceptable) in defensive wars, there will be violence before one side gives in to the negociation (or dies trying to fight it).

You also cannot change the past. Humans run countries and humans make mistakes. Sometimes this is why there is blood on the path to peace. For example, appeasement was a horrible idea; however, once it was done it was done. Yes, the war may have been avoided all together, but, you cannot change the past, you can only try to make up for it in the present.
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  #4  
June 22nd, 2006, 04:21 AM
syncere
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Posts: n/a
I think there is a difference in violence in war with the military and your child fighting with some kid(for example).. In general violence doesnt solve anything.. Say your child goes to school, the other kid calls him some childish name or says something bad about the mother, then proceeds to hit the other kid.. your child fights back and they both get suspended.. In that case violence isnt the answer as it accomplishes nothing KWIM?
If our military does not protect our country the war will spill over here.. Terrorists will be everywhere thousands upon thousands of innocent people getting killed right here on our soil.. In that case violence is needed.. So no I dont think its contradictory at all.. I think it varies on the situation.. Here in the states, for things like rapes, robbery, assault, general fighting violence is never the answer..
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  #5  
June 22nd, 2006, 04:25 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,496
Quote:
I think it varies on the situation..[/b]
That's basically the lesson we teach on the "absolutes" parents usually think about. Instead of "violence solves nothing," we teach about bodily respect, ways to avoid conflict with words, but also about defense in dire situations (something that we haven't had to teach about yet, seeing as our daughters are so young, but they will be learning about it).

Instead of "never talk to strangers," we talk about who to go to if you are in need and are alone, how to choose a "stranger" to talk to, how to use conversation to your advantage, who to run from, etc.
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  #7  
June 22nd, 2006, 05:57 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,667
I guess I don't think of defending oneself as "violence." If someone were to break into my house and I were to shoot them (and I would), would I be committing a violent act against them? A country going to war to defend itself or its interests is not committing violence either.
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  #8  
June 22nd, 2006, 06:10 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,780
Quote:
I guess I don't think of defending oneself as "violence."[/b]
I agree with this. The agressor is the violent person (or country).
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  #9  
June 22nd, 2006, 09:33 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Overland Park, Kansas
Posts: 717
Ok, I understand what you all are saying.

What about a situation such as: (and I've seen this many times and been in this situation as a child)

One child hits/pushes another..w/e and so the other child starts fighting back. The one defending himself/herself then gets reprimanded by saying "You shouldn't have taken it upon yourself to solve this. YOU should have been the bigger person and walked away".......what was he/she supposed to do? Stand there while they got the poo beat out of them?? Or...walked away WHILE getting the poo beat out of them?

I had this happen while I was in school many times (elementary and I've seen it lots in HS). I'd flat out tell the teacher "NO ONE lays a hand on me. I'll be [email protected]#$ED if I'm going to sit here and put up with this while yelling "teacher teacer..help he's hitting me"..No. You touch me, EXPECT to get a little love tap back."

So I guess I'm saying in situations like this~~where it's necessary to defend ourselves with violence...but them we are told "Violence doesn't solve anything, you should have been the bigger person"...Um...like you ladies said, when a country feels that it's being threatened we take force. It's what we've always done and will always do. So why is it such taboo to do it for our own safety??
I guess THAT is the question I'm trying to ask
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  #12  
July 20th, 2006, 11:03 AM
** Mandy **
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 24,284
Yes it does seem contradictory to me.

There is a bigger picture but in most cases I still don't agree... in other words, my opinion is that most of the wars/fighting we have been in have not been justified.

This is not to say I don't support the troops... I support them in trying to get them home.
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  #13  
July 21st, 2006, 07:01 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,090
I absolutly 100% do NOT agree with war or anything to do with it. Here is somthing I wrote in one of my blogs:

When are people gonna learn?
When are people going to learn that violence is not the answer? We teach our children to use words, not fists yet there are still people who believe that going into someone elses country and murdering hundreds of thousands of people is the way to solve problems. Yes, I do believe that somthing should be done about terrorism, but invading a country is not the answer. Trying to change a culture thats different from yours has never worked in the past, why do you think it's going to work now? No matter what anyone does, there will ALWAYS be people in this world that want to hurt others - those are the ones that should be dying, not innocent people. Not the mothers and fathers and husbands and wives and sons and daughters that are dying everyday because people still think that war is the only answer. Figure out another way of solving problems - STOP ACTING LIKE IMMATURE CHILDREN WHO DON'T KNOW ANY BETTER. Don't you think all that manpower could be better put to use doing somthing else? Solving poverty, hunger, over-population, helping to better educate people and maybe even clean up the air or help stop endangered species from dissapering? There are lots of things that need to be done to ensure that this planet stays around a while longer...why not help, rather than contribute to the damage?

This is how I feel and I will not change. I also told my husband before I married him that if he decides to join any kind of government power that supports war (navy, army...) that I would divorce him and I am not one who believes in divorce. That is just how strongly I feel. I was told once (by a friends dh) that I would have to respect his decision and live with it, well you know what? I would respect a decision like that but I would leave him. He knows this and he doesn't mind. If he felt that strongly about somthing and gave me an ultimatum I would respect it too. I knew a girl for 17 years. we were friends for 17 years. I decided to end that friendship because she didn't understand how I feel. It doesn't bother me, I have my values and my morals and I will not change them for anyone.

This is just my opinion
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