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April 19th, 2006, 10:57 AM
2BigBrothers1LittleSister's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 2,072
I know this is bad, Im 6wks pregnant and not sure if Im ready to have this baby! I just got engaged last Saturday and Im getting married Friday! I honestly dont know if Im ready, but obviously I cant change that. Im an emotional wreck! Im going to the bathroom every 5min! The M/S is about to kill me, I almost couldnt get out of bed. I want this baby, but I dont know if this is the right time. I obviously cant change this babies timing. Im a firm believe of pro life. And the bad word....abor....isnt nor ever was an option. Neither is adoption, the babies father wouldnt ever dream of it. Hes in the Army. He could be getting deployed about the time Im due! And I want him there. I dont have people who I can really confide in. I know this sounds like Im a bad person. I want to love this baby and let it know everything is going to be ok. But its hard. I guess I need some major support. I also dont know how to tell my DF this either. I dont want him to think poorly of me for it. Im only 18 will be 19 in July. Hes 20 and will be 21 in August. Im still a baby myself. Life is moving to fast. The way we saw it was, if we pg ok, if not ok. We werent trying, just enjoying each other, but we werent preventing it either. I feel like a bad person.

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April 19th, 2006, 01:23 PM
carolinagirl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 2,053
Hon, it's ok to be scared. I am a military wife myself and believe me I know the anxiety of deployments and pregnancy!! It will be ok, I promise. There are a lot of support groups out there for military spouses, fiances and girlfriends. I speak from experience when I tell you this, I've been thru it all. Yahoo has many fantastic military support groups to choose from, as well as a section on JM for military spouses/girlfriends.

Right now all your focus needs to be on staying stress free and getting the best medical treatment possible for your pregnancy. Keep saltines by your bedside and nibble on a few before you get up each morning - they will help to settle your stomach. Also try to drink as much water as possible and get plenty of rest. In a few weeks the M/S should subside and you'll really enjoy the rest of the pregnancy.

If you ever need to talk you can always IM here. Best of luck!

Tracey (34)

GOD, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference ~ Amen.

My Myspace & Yahoo 360*
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April 19th, 2006, 04:05 PM
Posts: n/a
I know you feel like a bad person.. but when you're feeling your lowest.. you can tell us so we can help you. We know you're not a bad person. We all have moments that make us feel like that. Even without a pregancy and M/S I would understand your emotional roller coaster. Your priniciples will help you get throught it and we can help you when you're in the heat of the moment.

Congradulations on your baby and your new marriage. I hope we can be part of your family too!

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April 19th, 2006, 06:08 PM
2BigBrothers1LittleSister's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 2,072
Thanks! I honestly cant say Im feeling better, but the word of encouragement do help! Trying to get a house to live in is stressful. Im going down there this weekend, to find a place. I have alot of "What If's."

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April 20th, 2006, 12:15 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 5,597
I know that there are always alot of what ifs. I was 17 when I had my DD, and I got married when I was pregnant too. I had so many things going on and yet felt like I had no control over my own life anymore. I love my DD more than anything in this world and wouldn't change anything about my life. But....I don't think that I'll ever feel 100% ready to be a mom, even though I am one. I am always afraid of messing up and her getting hurt. I think that it is what makes you a mom though, because those fears make you cautious and the love you feel makes every day worth while.

Oh, and now I'm pregnant with baby #2 at 19 years old. I don't think that I'll feel ready for 2 kids until I'm having #3 though. I just take everyday as it comes, and I remember that my life isn't complete without my kids.

I hope that you feel better soon.

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April 20th, 2006, 01:56 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 1,874
You are NOT a bad person please don't think that! I'm 18, I'll be 19 in July too!! Mines the 8th what's yours?? Anyhows I'mm due to have twins in August and when i first found out about it I was very excited but I just wished that it wasn't happening! I was SO sure that I was going to screw something up, not love the babies, not provide for them....In other words I knew I was NOT ready for one baby let alone two.... But when you think about it there isn't much you can do it's happened and it is going to turn out to be one of the GREaTEST things in your life!!!

I'm still positive that I am not ready for these babies and I regret not trying to stop it but there is NO way in hell that I regret or ever will regret having my babies. I mean yes I should have waited but I would NOT change it for the world. When you get even further along and the love for your unborn child has had a chance to sink in and grow you'll realise that even if you aren't ready for this you will adapt and you will be a wonderful mother to your child!

When I told my sister how I felt about the babies and thinking I wouldn't be able to love them she told me that when she was pregnant with her second child at first she couldn't get her head around the idea of loving him, she just felt nothing for him. But once she realised what was happening she couldn't help but love him. She said it's as though the babies bring their own love with them and even if you didn't have it in the first place it WILL come! So don't worry about that yuo just need to overcome the initial shock and what if questions and you'll be ok. Everything will get better! ((hugs))

The support you REALLY need is goingto come from your DF, he's the one that can really assure you that everything will turn out ok. He LOVES you he's going to marry you, he WILL understand if you tell him how you feel so please do!

As for him getting deployed around the time of the birth it's in 7 and 1/2 months worry about that bridge when you need to cross it! there is no point adding the extra stress that you don't need!! Take "baby steps" deal with things as they come up not things that are over half a year away!

If you ever want someone in a similar situation to talk to feel free to IM me things will get better sweety just take it easy and don't stress too much!

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