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May 1st, 2006, 05:12 PM
babysmith's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: california
Posts: 2,780
GRRR, I love my sil, but she is pregnant with her first, and is around 11 weeks or so, I am happy they are pregnant, we went to lucnh on last sunday, she called and ask what we were doin I told her I dont know, and she said well we are all getiing together to go eat do you and nathan wanna come, I told her well let me talk to dh and I will get back to you, well I called her 5 min later and told her that we are gonna come to lunch with her,she was like oh it sounded like she was dissapointed, we get to where we were going for lunch and it was her mom and grandpa, and her husband my husband, our son me and her dhs and my dhs parents.., dhs parents were saying they needed to hurry and eat cause they have to get somewhere, she looked at me and nathan and said well I didn't know they were comin.. it made me so mad, its like now that she is pregnant she doens't want me around cause I am also pregnant, kinda like when her mom called her and said that, she couldn't make to my shower cause she couldn't get off, she told her mom, she had to go to her shower cause that was the important one, it made me so angry she makes me feel like my pregnancy doesn't even exist, maybe I just have the case of the grumps, but last year for gavins first bday we had this planned since he was born, we wanted to go to the aquarium and we told the family what we were doin, her and her dh went to las vergas on gavins birthday, and then told us we never told them about it, HELLO he was born a year ago, they had a years notice, and this year we are gonna take him to the san fran zoo, and she tells me she might not be able to make it, I am getting so annoyed with it, its like me and dhs family dont exist, and what makes it even more sad, it that its my son who she is also hurting... this will be the second bday she missed if she doesn't go, I am getting to the point where i dont wanna do anything with her anymore, she got mad at me cause her baby shower is in august and Devin will be about a month, old and said it sucks that your gonna be there cause your take all the spotlight, I have half the mind to tell her to go to hell I aint gonna go, she is suppose to be planning my baby shower, but so far I have BOUGHT evrything for it, and she doens't want to talk about getting things ready for the shower, I am so bumbed I was getting excited, cause she didn't throw me one with gavin, but she wanted to with this one, but since she got pregnant she doesnt seem to want to do it anymore, I have talked to her about it, and she chanes the subject to her pregnany, I am like okay whatever....

maybe its just cause I am prego, sorry the vent jumps around, I am just getting irritated with it all...
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May 1st, 2006, 09:41 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 725
I'm sorry!!! your SIL sounds like a jerk, hopefully she will stop treating you and your family that way. Have you tried talking to her about it? Well I really hope that everything turns out great for you!

Celebrating our Third Anniversary![br]
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May 2nd, 2006, 01:11 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Australia
Posts: 740
Can you casually say to her that seeing as she doesn't have time to do anything for your baby shower, can you ask someone else to take over organising it? i guess i can only wonder if it is some sort of jealousy thing - especially as she doesn't want you 'stealing the limelight' at her baby shower. my friend's baby was 6 weeks old at my baby shower, two other friends were just behind me in their pregnancies and i thought that was a wonderful sign of where we were all at in our lives and never for one minute thought that 6 week old baby would steal the limelight. sounds like she is insecure perhaps but it's a shame it is affecting your relationship.

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May 2nd, 2006, 08:09 AM
in_mommy's Avatar I am just me
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 14,873
I agree with whynot, she is too wrapped up in her own insecurities and selfishness to be kind to you or even plan your shower. Tell her that since she no longer appears to have the desire or the time to do your shower, that you are going to have a friend or another relative do it for her instead.
Sometimes, relatives like that, you just have to write off and move on. Sounds like she has always been selfish and could not be counted on. She is always going to hurt you and disappoint you until the day comes and hits her upside the head and she realizes what she has been doing, but for most people, that day doesnt seem to ever come.
If you have tried talking to her about how she is making you feel and she continues, then dont continue to subject yourself to her behavior you dont need her.
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May 5th, 2006, 02:20 PM
lapoema's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Florida
Posts: 7,190
Some people are just irritating like that. I have a few in my life. I try to stay at arm's length from them. When I have to be around them, I make sure that I 1) mentally prep myself for dealing with my anger. 2) Act as mature and classy as possible. Getting upset just makes you look bad, and 3) Gripe away to DH when it's over!

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May 6th, 2006, 05:07 AM
beggmel's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 677
I always wondered why some people are so selfish? My SIL is preggers too, she's having twins and I'm throwing her baby shower tomorrow! I'm so pumped for the twins to come, I can't wait to be their favorite auntie! And she's pumped that I'm pregnant and her boys will have a cousin 6 months younger than them! I feel bad for you, maybe you need to take a break from her? If she's not throwing you a shower, why should you throw one for her?

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