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Forum: Weaning


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July 3rd, 2010, 10:43 AM
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 41
I've been having majot problems nursing for over a month now. I don't even know how it started....

But I now have deeeeeeep cuts and tears ALL over both nipples. When she nursing, I scream like I'm in labor. I cry. I absolutely hate feeding her..and I hate feeling that way.

I've recently decided, after fearing infection and long term damage, that It's time to stop. Hailey will be a year old in just one months time.

I've been trying to atleast slow down for about a week now. She still eats about 4 or more times a night. And can barely go two hours through the day. She is eatting full real meals through the day, but she doesn't consider it subsitution. She still wants to nurse right after. How do I curb the emotional nursing? She can't even go to sleep, at nap time or night time, without nursing. Do I just let her suffer?

There are no IBCLC in the area, so I have no one to turn to. This is the most pain I've ever been in, and I am surprised I let it go on this long.

And yes, I've tried lanolin, I've tried neosporin, I've tried johnsons baby lotion, I've even tried burts bees chapstick!! Nothing will let it heal, becuase she rips it open with every feeding. Pumping makes it even worse. I bleed so much while she eats, which REALLY makes me not want to feed her becuase she looks like a vampire!

Does anyone have ANY advice? I have no idea how to get to her stop eatting. I'm done!
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July 26th, 2010, 11:48 PM
ChicaChels's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: I'm a husker girl :)
Posts: 16,336
do you have WIC or le leche league meetings around you? That sounds really horrible...if she is almost 1 I can't imagine it would be a latch problem? I'm in the process of becoming IBCLC, but this baffles me. I have no idea what a 1 year old could do other than chew on your nipple to cause that...do you know exactly what she is doing that is causing this??

Maverick Jude
December 9, 2013
5:20PM 8lb3oz 20.5"
Hospital water birth
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July 28th, 2010, 10:20 AM
Posts: n/a
Does she have teeth? Did this start around the time that teeth started showing up?

The reason I ask is because some LOs will change their latch once teeth come in...so it could very well be the latch.

Do you have a Le Leche League in your area? I would call the leader and see if you could maybe meet up or come to a meeting.
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July 31st, 2010, 08:14 PM
Abba's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 138
I can't be much help for you...

My LO also nurses to sleep and at naps. I've come to the conclusion (thanks to Dr. Sears) that there may come a day where I have to rock her to sleep / hold her while she screams bloody murder because I'm not nursing her. I hope I can wean her and / or teach her to sleep without nursing without having to do this.

But if it comes down to it, holding her while she cries is not nearly as cruel as other forms of weaning and sleep training.

Sure she won't be happy because she is confused and not getting her way and tired and having trouble figuring out what comes next. But I'll be there comforting her and reassuring her and helping her through the transition. And babies are resilient. She'll learn and you'll be there to comfort her and help her learn as gently as possible.

I think you're doing the right thing. I'm sorry it hurts so much. Mothers try to be so self-less, but it is okay for you to want to stop since it hurts so badly. I won't let my LO grab my nipples and yank while she nurses. Playing with my other nipple is a comfort to her and it helps her fall to sleep. Sometimes when she gets rough and I stop her, she cries, and it takes much MUCH longer to get her to sleep, but I've decided I have a few rights. I have the right to not have her hurt my nipple. I know that is a weak example and you've gone through MUCH greater pain more selflessly than I have. I'm just saying I think it is okay for you to stop. You've made it a long way - a lot longer than most.

Here is a Dr. Sears quote: "Babies may initially protest when offered father instead of mother, but remember, crying and fussing in the arms of a loving parent is not the same as "crying it out." I know it is about fathers, but I think it still applies.


Last edited by Abba; July 31st, 2010 at 08:19 PM.
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August 2nd, 2010, 04:04 PM
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 41
she started getting teeth at 3 months. she has four on top, four on bottom and starting to get two molars on bottom. no new teeth recently so I don't think it's teeth.

I"m still having trouble. it will switch off now though. it used to be both, but now it will be one at a time. Still no leeway on weaning. she turned one year old yesterday and we are moving into a new place in a month, I will try establish some kind of better routine then I guess...
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August 5th, 2010, 01:00 PM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 142
I hope you find a solution soon. I just emailed La Leche League in my area an hr ago for my problem. I am not having bleeding, I am so sorry you are....
I do have alot of pain and I hope you get her to stop nursing soon. My daughter is 25 mths and STILL will not go to sleep without nursing. I have been trying to get her to stop since she was a yr and here we are a yr later and I am 4 mths pregnant. I am about to lose whats left of my mind.
With that said if you find anything please share and I will do the same!

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