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Drama with Neely's ex yesterday

Forum: Blended Families


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November 26th, 2010, 01:50 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
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Man, it's always something. But it has done something really good in that Neely has finally finally decided that if she can't stick to the visitation schedule and court order, then the visit will not happen.

Anyway, we dropped the kids off to her on Wednesday afternoon/evening like she wanted. The plan was for her to have an early Thanksgiving lunch with them and then we'd have them for dinner. She sent Neely a text saying where he could pick the kids up. It had been previously agreed that he would pick them up at a friend's house closer to our house than her house, but the address she sent him was an hour further away, which would mean we'd be in the car for 3 freaking hours.

He told her that wasn't going to fly and he'd have to get them before she left to go to that house or she'd have to keep them till today. Well she flipped out and he just said he would pick them up tomorrow (today) at 6:45 a.m. (she said she had to work Friday at 7). Anyway, she was not happy, but Neely was really firm with her that she had to have sort of consequence for changing the plans half-way through the day. She really did not want to keep them another night, so she said she'd have her (now estranged) current husband drop them off last night, but Neely called him and asked him not to do that. (They are old high school buddies. That's a long story.)

He also told her that because he missed Thanksgiving with them, she's going to miss Christmas and she said that by then we will have gone back to court and it will all be settled anyway and the kids would be with her. Yeah, we do have court on the 15th of December, but it's for child support. She hasn't filed any pleadings or moved to have custody/visitation changed, so that's not gonna happen.
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November 26th, 2010, 03:37 PM
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My husband's ex was like that with visitation, when we were closer. We'd have to bring them to her, AND pick them up. Visitation was from like 5pm Friday to 5pm on Sunday, or something. We'd always have to drop them off after 5, and pick them up after breakfast on Sunday. Or she'd want them Saturday morning, and we'd have to pick them up Sunday morning. It was always constantly changing because "she was busy" or "she had plans."

I wish my husband got firm with her like Neely is doing with this ex.

I'm so sorry she's being this way.
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November 27th, 2010, 07:26 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,310
Good for Neely for sticking to the plan.

I do understand though. For the most part, dh's ex has been pretty good. They meet 1/2 way. But there was the 1 time that they set the time and dh left. When he got to the meeting spot - they weren't there. He waited 1/2 hour & then called. They hadn't even left yet. They were 2 hours away! So dh drove 2 hours & then waited 3 more hours for them to show up. They could have called to tell him they were running late. But didn't. I was livid because on top of that, my car was in the shop. So dh had driven me to work & the kids to daycare. He was supposed to be back before I got off of work & pick us all up. But wasn't. I got a friend to drive me to the daycare & then we had to sit outside for 1 hour in the 90 plus degree weather with no shade waiting for them to show up. You can imagine how not happy I was. An infant & a 4 year old & me.......

My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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