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Forum: Blended Families


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April 29th, 2011, 07:57 PM
pmdc5286's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: GA
Posts: 1,757
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Hi everyone. My name is Patty and I would like to join your group. I have a wonderful, but crazy blended family. I am getting married in Oct. My fiance Jonah and I have 3 kids between us.

My son Sean is 14, his bio father is not active in his life, thru bio father's choice. My dau Dani 8, her dad is active on a every other weekend basis for the most part.

Jonah's son, Robert, is 11, Autistic and several other mental health disorders. We got a call last Tues that he was losing his place to live with his mom, and we needed to come get him (over 4 hours away) because he needed somewhere to live ASAP. (There is more to the story but...)This is the second time since Sept he has become homeless. The first time we let him go back to his mom. They have joint legal, she has physical in the divorce. We left out early Wed morning to go get him after quickly arranging after school care for my daughter, because my son was on an out of town trip with school. He was happy to be coming with us and very ready to go.

Things we have found out in the week and a half we have had him living with us.
-truancy is on mom because if he didn't want to go to school he didn't go and she didn't make him.
-he is very behind educationally. She kept us out of the loop. He reads on a K level. We will be meeting with the new school next week. He is LD but this is unacceptable. He told us she would not help him with his homework.
-She milked the system for everything. Told the school system she could not afford school supplies, a coat, etc. WE BOUGHT EVERYTHING THE BABY NEEDED. We spent over $500 for 3 kids for school supplies, shoes, etc.
-All of the bad behavior she said he was exhibiting we are not seeing. She said he hits her, cusses her out, etc. He has NEVER done that here in all the time my fiance and I have been together.

We have him enrolled in the behavioral school he was enrolled in before his mom decided to move 4 hours away and he is happy here. I have him with mental health again and have him set up for a physical just for giggles to be on the safe side. He is happy here. We are very leary about letting him go back to his mom as she is having trouble keeping a residence.

There are 5 adults living in 1 house. 2 Receive disability including the child and his mom. No adults work.

He came here looking ragged in clothes. Many not fit for school. We bought his clothes.

He brought video games that are rated M and told us that his mom said he could play them here. His dad said his mom doesn't make the rules here. We do. We have put him on the same rules as the 8 y/o has. His violence has decreased greatly at school since we have had him in just the week.

His mom is refusing to sign custody to dad because of the check. Any ideas on how to get him quickly? He can't go back to that.

Thank you JMC1988 for my siggy!

TTC #3, Our first together

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April 30th, 2011, 07:04 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
Posts: 115,722
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Welcome Patty!

I don't know about where you live, but here in Maryland you can file an emergency ex parte (meaning without the other party knowing) change in custody. Here you can get a hearing within 2 days. I would consult with an attorney and find out if that is something you can do where you live. It sounds like you have enough grounds to get granted physical custody at the very least on an emergency basis, if he's technically homeless.
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April 30th, 2011, 09:43 PM
pmdc5286's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: GA
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Apparently I am the Wicked Witch of the East! My step son's mom stopped by my fiance's work tonight. They have found an apartment so they say and are moving. I took him by to see his mom.

We are now keeping them from getting the apartment. Why you may ask...We won't let them put the utilities in one of our names. You see, they have run out of people to put names in and walking on the bills and now want ours. NOT HAPPENING! Evidently from what they told Jonah all their bills were very far behind and they were just paying enough to keep them on, and they just walked away from them. They are not doing this to me. I don't have IDIOT stamped on my forehead!

Thank you JMC1988 for my siggy!

TTC #3, Our first together

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May 2nd, 2011, 10:40 AM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
Posts: 13,499
Welcome to the board. I would contact a lawyer asap and see what legal resources you guys have in your state. Good luck.

❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
Liz (36) Kev (35)
Tiana (16) Doni (14) Lil Kev (8) Ethan 7/23/12 Lil Roo 10/29/11

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