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isn't that what CS is for?!

Forum: Blended Families


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  • 4 Post By Ember Rose
  • 3 Post By Rachel
  • 3 Post By plan4fate
  • 1 Post By w292737
  • 1 Post By beccasmom7718
  • 3 Post By K.A.T

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August 22nd, 2012, 12:01 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,769
since we didn't give the money for clothes she has figured out another way to get some money..
we sent her the CS on friday yesterday she calls crying saying she needs 500$ for rent or they're getting kicked out(they JUST moved into a new place because she didn't pay rent on the previous house) and she had to get her car fixed so she is totally broke...
DH told her we do not have the kinda of money. we just gave her 600$ for CS!
she said "well if you can give me 200$ I can come up with the rest" bull****.!
he told her he would see what he could do after we pay our bills.. I told him to NOT be a pushover.
of course he said "well what if she's telling the truth and I don't help her and my kids end up on the street"
ughhh point proven, okay..
he said he'd send her like 100$ just to appease her.
I HATE that she uses those kids to get what she wants
once again I find myself saying "if she can't take care of them WE CAN"

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August 22nd, 2012, 12:12 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,684
NO! Send the money to the apartment complex. Do NOT send it directly to her. They won't give you info about whether or not she's telling the truth but they will take a payment.
Rachel, plan4fate, K.A.T and 1 others like this.
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August 22nd, 2012, 12:24 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
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Awe that's a good point! Something really sounds fishy there!

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August 22nd, 2012, 12:45 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Originally Posted by Ember Rose View Post
NO! Send the money to the apartment complex. Do NOT send it directly to her. They won't give you info about whether or not she's telling the truth but they will take a payment.

and if she gets evicted, then he has grounds for filing for emergency custody.
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August 22nd, 2012, 01:01 PM
Baby Boy Coming in March!
Join Date: Jul 2012
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That's very scary that she may get evicted yet again.

I certainly hope that she is able to get it together and provide some kind of stable environment for the kids. If not, I definitely think you guys should discuss trying to get custody in order to give the kids a more stable environment, of course if you are able to do that....

I'm sorry you have to deal with this. I'm sure it's a headache. But I would definitely have the payment sent directly to her landlord rather than through her.

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August 22nd, 2012, 02:18 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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There would so not be any money changing hands here. We'd have paid L's rent if needed, to her complex, but no funds to her. We'd also probably have shown up to take Reme with an emergency order.
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August 22nd, 2012, 03:12 PM
Happy Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest
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Document all of this!

and then yes. if he wants ot send $100 to help. he needs ot make it out to the complex as a credit to her bill.
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August 22nd, 2012, 03:14 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 932
Thats exactly what the boys mom did to us, and it helped us get full custody of them. She moved 6times in 5months because of no money for rent, we also bought formula for baby because she didnt have any money for that. the next time she said she needed money for formula, we kept baby until she had money..which was over 2months .
People need to get their priorities straight!
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August 22nd, 2012, 04:16 PM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
Posts: 13,499
A great way to call her buff is ask whom to make the check payable to besides her. That will either put an end to it, or confirm it to be true. I hate that stuff. People need to learn to pay their bills and manage their money. This truly burns me since I have a deadbeat tenant right now, along with a deadbeat MIL who's trying to move into my new home rent free. GRRRRRRRRRRRRR

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August 22nd, 2012, 06:54 PM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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Originally Posted by stresswife View Post
once again I find myself saying "if she can't take care of them WE CAN"
I sympathize with this so. freaking. much. It's so frustrating to watch someone handle their money terribly and then act like it's their ex's fault that they're having issues. It's even more frustrating when they use the children as pawns and try to play the guilt trip game.

I agree that if you send anything (which, personally, I wouldn't because if she's not able to manage her finances properly she shouldn't be the custodial parent) it should be to the property owner, not to bm. It is NOT your dh's job to save her from her poor decision making.

And yes - document, document, document. Have these conversations via email if at all possible.

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August 22nd, 2012, 07:01 PM
stucklikeglue's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I 100% agree with Liz. Sorry you are going through this!

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August 23rd, 2012, 08:50 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 972
Make the check out to the rental company. Not to her. When Paul's ex wanted money for K's health insurance we asked for a copy of her pay stub to see how much money is pulled from her check and we said we would divide that amount by 4 and pay half of that amount. (she has herself and her twin boys also on the policy) We never saw a stub and were never asked again.
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