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I've been really depressed lately

Forum: Mental Health


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May 17th, 2010, 11:04 AM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 58
I'm new to this board, and fairly new to JM as well. I have suffered from depression many times in the past. I was on Prozac about a year ago but then I stopped taking it(without dr's consent - I know, I probably shouldn't have). I was having trouble paying for the dr visits and the meds. Well, anyway, I was doing fine, until recently. I moved, and changed jobs, and I am going through some bad money problems. I have been really down lately, feeling tearful and lonely, not motivated to do much. I am still functioning fine. I get up and go to work, and I take care of my dd just fine, but I am just not happy. I am not sure if this is a full fledged depression episode coming on or just the stress from all the changes. The thing is, I don't have a dr out here to go see. I lost my health insurance when I changed jobs, and I don't know if I should try to get an appt with the county mental health, which could take weeks, maybe months, or should just try to deal with the stress on my own and see if things get better. I know all of you don't really know me yet, but what do you think?
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May 17th, 2010, 12:31 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 2,338
I've been in your position, or at least something quite similar and what I did was just find outlets for myself because I was not about to wait months to be seen in my county. I found that writing helped but also venting to everyone online as I'm relatively friendless where I live. I know that I found anything at all that made me feel some sort of happiness or some sense of normalcy helped me out. It did take me a long time to become okay with where I was---but eventually I did get there. I would say that you should try and make an appointment because perhaps you might be able to get in to see someone who is great and can help you and in the meantime you can try to manage things the best you can. I wish you the best.

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May 17th, 2010, 07:01 PM
Gaby&Emmy'sMama's Avatar aka NZ-Emma
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 56,618
I have been in a similar situation.. went on Prozac, after a long battle with depression, started feeling good again.. went off the Prozac.. went through some life changes - and started feeling not-so-great again...

I really would suggest finding a doctor to talk to - because you DON'T have to put up with not being happy... I find that for me, when I start feeling not-happy - but am still coping with life, it doesnt' take long before I find myself right in the middle of a breakdown, or in the midst of a horrible bout of depression...

I'm sorry your'e going through this

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May 17th, 2010, 07:07 PM
ShesaDreamer's Avatar If Only. If Only <3
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In the Wild and Wonderful
Posts: 4,844
I would suggest trying to make an appointment. Then when the time comes around for you to go to it and you are feeling better thats great you can go and tell the DR was was going on and all of that But I would at least try to get one just to make sure you don't get too far in a episode. Keep us posted and welcome tot he board!
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May 20th, 2010, 06:47 PM
ZaydensMomma's Avatar Aaron Nicole
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Indiana
Posts: 16,454
I agree with PP.... if you keep putting off not seeing a therapist or a doctor, you may end up having a breakdown. I put off therapist for a long time then I took a step and asked around for help. Is there any local groups you can go for free? Or do you have medical assistance to help you cover for the therapist/doctor expenses? I hope you are having better day today!

Age 36 with PCOS, poor ovarian reserve (.197), and blocked left fallopian tube.
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May 22nd, 2010, 02:28 PM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 58
Originally Posted by Hoosier Kitty View Post
I agree with PP.... if you keep putting off not seeing a therapist or a doctor, you may end up having a breakdown. I put off therapist for a long time then I took a step and asked around for help. Is there any local groups you can go for free? Or do you have medical assistance to help you cover for the therapist/doctor expenses? I hope you are having better day today!
I don't qualify for any medical assistance since I am working and getting child support. My meager earnings are too much for me to get any medical assistance, though I might be able to get some assistance from the drug companies so I could afford the Prozac or whatever the dr might recommend. I don't know of any free groups around here, but maybe i will give the county mental health center a call next week. At work, they have a free number you can call to talk to a therapist on the phone. I might use that until I can get an appointment.

My dd is with her dad this week, so I am a little lonely. The solitude and all is a little nice, but after a while it gets to be a little much. I am having a lot of financial problems. I need to call my dad and ask for some money but I hate talking to him, and I hate asking people, even family, for money, but I have no choice. If I don't, I won't have enough money to pay next month's rent. But He always makes me feel terrible when I ask him for money, but if I don't ask and I mess things up, then he makes me feel terrible for not asking. When I talk to him, I feel like a little kid again. I want to feel like I am a grown woman who can handle my money and my life without his help.

I have so many decisions I need to make, and I don't know where to start or what to decide. I think I should file for bankruptcy, but I feel like a loser doing that. Then if I do, it is who do I call, how do I find the time to get it all done,...... I need a new career, but that starts off a whole new barrage of what ifs and other questions. Should I go back to college to get a bachelor's degree? Do I go to a technical college to get a degree that would take less time? What should I study? How do I know if it will be the right fit for me? What if I do it and then I still can't find a good paying job? I could lay awake at night thinking about it all, so I try not to think about it and so nothing gets decided and nothing gets done, and so I stay in this terrible mess that is my life.
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