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How do your DH/SO cope?

Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance


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December 23rd, 2010, 01:17 PM
mcmarlena's Avatar Pregnant Again!!
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 2,179
Hi. My name is Marlena and my DH and I have been ttc since July of 09. I went today to talk to my gyno about our next steps. I'm going in for a bloodtest in about 12 days, and then an xray to make sure my tubes aren't blocked. Then DH will go for his SA.

DH has agreed to help in anyway that he can, but I know he's nervous and uncomfortable about "producing" a sample. I told him I'd be willing to come in and help, but he says he might just go it alone becuase he'll already be uncomfortable.

So how did your DH's react? Are they totally comfortable? Nervous? Standoffish?
Mitch and Marlena, proud parents to Devin, Liam, and Micah.

Team BLUE!! Two precious boys born on October 28th, 2013.
Liam - 6lbs 7oz
Micah - 6lbs 10oz

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December 23rd, 2010, 01:48 PM
JulieC's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,436
My DH wasn't happy about doing the SA. I did all the tests that could do and now its his turn. He goes on Jan 8th but we just have to drop off the sample. Do you have to do it at the office or can he do it at home? I think it makes it easier for them to do it at home! Good luck!
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December 23rd, 2010, 04:04 PM
LindseyandJoeinAL's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,615
My DH, bless his heart, has fun with it! He joking says "I've going to make love to a cup today!" He actually told that to the receptionist after my retrieval!! I've been with him twice and actually did all the "work" for him. I wore a sexy bra and unbuttoned my blouse so he could enjoy the ladies while I got the sample. Try not to worry too much or it will be weird. Good luck honey!
Lindsey - 38
Joe - 46
TTC baby #2

lap surgery Apr 2010 stage 2 endo removed
IVF #1 BFN 11/2010
IVF #2 BFP! 12/2010
Wonderful, sweet daughter Khloe born August 2011
FET #1 - Oct 2012 BFN
FET #2 - Dec 2012 BFN
2nd lap surgery Dec 2012 stage 1 endo removed
IUI Apr 2013 cancelled due to producing 10 mature follicles
IUI June 2013 BFN
IVF #3 Sept 2013 BFN
IVF #4 Nov 2013 BFP! on 8dp3dt
Expecting boy/girl twins 8/1/14

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December 23rd, 2010, 05:06 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 8,103
DH always went in alone. He didn't really want me to go in and make things even more weird. He only had a "problem" once trying to get the deed done. Other than that he was in and out no issues.

You can certainly try collecting at home, they actually have collection condoms you can use. Otherwise you can do the traditional cup collection at home and get the sample to the lab within a half an hour and you should be good to go.

Yet another wonderful siggy by HeatherW.... thank you so much!!!

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December 23rd, 2010, 05:10 PM
esparando para bebé's Avatar Proud Car Seat Technician
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 19,613
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My DH didn't really say anything one way or another. He's produced two "samples" so far. Once for a SA and once for an IUI.

Thanks to Jaidynsmum for my siggy!
Proud former foster parent to a teen. Waiting on our next call. Proud Aunt to 22.
Proud mommy to 7 angels. Survivor of 4 failed adoptions (5 kids)
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December 24th, 2010, 12:21 AM
tamtamtamara's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: San Francisco/Bay Area
Posts: 120
My husband had to go in an give a 'sample'... and it was definitely something that was quite uncomfortable for him. He was a serious trooper about it though! I don't envy the guys one bit! It's got to be unpleasant!

"I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." ~Diane Ackerman
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December 24th, 2010, 04:51 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2,464
One of the most miserable, uncomfortable, werid, awkward moments that my DH & I have EVER had was the morning of his SA. My doc let the collection take place at home but I think at the last minute it totally stressed him out, it almost didnt work (& I was on the verge of tears) but in the end, it happened. I'm absolutely dreading him having to do it again for our IUI in January. I already warned him he's on his own completely, my anxiousness wont help matters !!!!
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December 24th, 2010, 08:58 AM
eccomi's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: italy
Posts: 3,604
my DH wasn't thrilled with the prospect but in the end he delivered! the first SA was at home and the second one was at the clinic. both times he told me that he preferred to do it alone so of course i respected his wishes. i think that they become accustomed to it and DH saw the humor in it at the fertility clinic because it was obvious what the guys were doing and the funny little bell that rings when the sample is ready to be picked up (i didn't even notice it but he's the one that pointed it out to me).
thank you bonnie (cavewoman) for my beautiful siggy!

cycles 1-16: TTC naturally, all BFNs
cycle 17 & 18: not TTC (due to diagnostic tests)
october 14: RE appt with follow-up hysteroscopy + saline sonogram... TUBES ARE CLEAR!
cycle 19, 20 & 21: natural TTC cycles = BFNs
cycle 22: another natural cycle, but preparing for our first IUI with injectables for cycle 23! FINALLY!!!
FEBRUARY 10th... our very first when we least expected it!!!

october 26th... our little miracle arrived via c-section at 12:19pm weighing 3.920 kilos! we are in love.
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