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Pregnant with number 4 and need some help...

Forum: Large Families


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November 1st, 2010, 04:03 AM
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Hey all. Im pregnant with my 4th child. I have 3 daughters 5,3 and 9 months & im pregnant with my 4th due in early april.

At the moment i feel so tired.. I getting reallt frustrated because my girls seem to put there toys everywhere around the house... they dump out all of there toys on the floor and dont even play with them... and they are the same with their clothes.. rip them out and throw the on the floor.. they have been trying to get into everything.. my oldest daughter has been drawing on the walls.. i feel as i clean they are making a mess behind me.. I have been turning into a nut case slowly lol... im just geting frustrated with the mess.. even if i sit down talk to them nice or put them in the naughty chair... 10 mins later they are doing the same thing.. i dont want to yell.. i feel bad if i do.. i will admit at times i have. My 9month old is very demanding atm... shes been full on.. i just dont know how to cope atm with being pregnant.. my 9month old wants to be on my hip or in my arms 24/7... my older two girls are always making a mess... then i get into a fight with dh because he thinks im lazy because the house is untidy..

any advice or tips to keep thing under control? do yous have a cleaning routine?how do yous control your kids from changing 10+ times a day.. or making a complete mess all day.. ?
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November 1st, 2010, 06:52 AM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 6,406
First, give yourself a lot of grace and mercy. Being pg with that many littles is going to take a lot of work. Tell your DH to lump it. If he doesn't like something, he can clean it.

The 5 and 3 need discipline. No naughty chair. You have to show them where to put their things, and stand there while they do it. Then, you need to get rid of most of it. We hardly have any toys and only 2 drawers of clothes for each kid. The less there is to clean up, the easier it is. And then, if you tell them not to dump stuff out and they do, a good solid spanking is in order. My kids have never really had the "change 10 times a day" habit. I am not sure why. But the mess does just seem to follow. I really think limited stuff is the key. Drawing on walls is a spankable offense to me.
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November 1st, 2010, 07:55 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Somewhere near Detroit, MI
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I agree with the limited stuff.

It is hard to have lil ones and be pg. Your dh could help more.

If they continue to dump out toys and clothes tell them they will lose them. Get a big plastic bin and keep everything they refuse to pick up after one request. Throw away what you won't miss. Tell the kids they have to earn back what is in the bin by doing extra help around the house.

Give yourself a break, evrything doesn't have to be perfect.
Jenifer....The Queen Bee
Nehemiaah Franklin 11/10/14 4:16am 9lbs 9oz
Welcome to the world lil' man!!
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November 2nd, 2010, 04:20 AM
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Yeah I know.. I just feel bad. I go to other people places and its like nothing is out of place and i think argh.. i would like my house to be somewhat like that.. people come to my place and i just feel so uncomfortable having them here as i feel like its to untidy.
I really think i will have to get rid of alot of stuff here. Im sure my girls will live without all their clothes and toys. Thanks ladies.
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November 2nd, 2010, 05:49 AM
~Katie~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 15,110
I am pregnant too and have 5 kiddos, and I have been feeling the same way...I am tired and sick to my belly all the time, well, I did go off yesterday, I felt ok and I laid the law down, my middle level got cleaned and today my upstairs will get clean and EVERYONE pitches in.

I started taking things away, and we are getting rid of most of the toys and going through clothes so we can avoid this. I blame alot of the stuff on me cause I can't get rid of stuff and I was thinking last night...they dont play with that, they dont wear that, that is paper that we dont need...its time to clean house!!! haha.

My dh has said that to me one time and I left him here with all the kids and he now knows what I go through!
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November 2nd, 2010, 11:54 AM
SnowAngel's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 1,308
Marlz you should see my house. a complete mess. right now I am lucky the kitchen is spotless. We have our youngest keep her toys in her room. I do have a problem with the older two buts more of them not cleaning up after themselves. we are working on that.

I suggest leaving the kids with him an entire day. He will quickly see how difficult it is.

Me~42 Dh~43
DD~17 yrs, DS~16yrs, DD~8yrs

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November 2nd, 2010, 01:26 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 8,385
((((hugs)))) you've just reminded me of exactly how I was feeling when I was pregnant with my 4th, I kept on waiting to get some energy back after my 1st trimester, and it just never happened.

Don't be too hard on yourself, I know the mess can be hard to deal with, but right now is not the time for a tidy house, it's a house for living in.
mom of 5 girls
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November 3rd, 2010, 02:45 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 11,883
my house isn't clean, i try though. with that many kids, it just doesn't work. i have a room dedicated to just clothes and they don't really go in there. that has really helped with the clothes messes. as for toys, i lock them up. i have 4 locked buckets and only one is allowed out at a time. if they want another bucket, then the one that is out has to be put away first. there are still toys everywhere, but not as many. my kids have chores as well. even the two year old helps. i don't make her, but she watches the older kids and jumps in to help. if i let her, she can unload the dishwasher by herself and put everything away in it's proper place. discipline? you bet ya. do what you have to. if you let them walk all over you now, it will only get worse. my younger sister let her kids walk all over her and i tell you, she is in a world of hurt now. her kids are the absolute worst kids i have ever met. oh, and have them clean with you. i've found that telling them to pick up all the red toys and then the circle toys helps them become interested in cleaning. might be a good place to start.

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November 5th, 2010, 08:38 AM
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 8
I take away toys and make my kids stay in their rooms until everything is clean. BUT my kids are older!

As for your DH, He needs to just be quiet. If he has an issue with something not being "clean enough", tell him to clean it himself!
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November 5th, 2010, 05:35 PM
escowood84's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: May 2009
Location: California
Posts: 335
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Well Im not prego right now but I have been frustrated with my kids mess. I have learned to give chores and start young it will help in the long run. I made a playroom and no toys are to go in there rooms or living areas that way the mess stays in one area and they can still play and have fun, I also have girls that like to change 10x a day so I recently got plastic bens to put extra clothes in and change out every week that way they only have what they need in there dressers for the week, my sister is currantly liven with us so when she moves out I am going to use that room like a big clothes closet that way the kids stay out, because I know I have way to much laundry so any help keeping the girls out is great cuz they get worst as they get older!!! Good luck and let your hubby deal with all the chores and girls for one day and get out by your self he'll fill dif after !!!
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