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Ack! Kiefer makes Cameron cry!

Forum: Moms and Expectant Moms of Multiples


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August 21st, 2009, 10:30 AM
TheyGrowLikeWeeds's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: NC
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Poor Cameron. Kiefer has gotten aggressive. He's not being malicious. He's just learning about the things he can do. One of them just happens to be having fun hitting Cameron over the head or in the face with various stuff like cups and buckets and plastic balls. Poor Cameron doesn't even want Kiefer to touch him anymore even if it's a soft touch or just a simple rumble. Cameron has to initiate playtime with Kiefer in order for him to not cry when Kiefer's around.

I'm not sure what to do about that. I understand when Kiefer's hitting him that he'd cry, but if Kiefer does so much as touch him nicely, he'll cry and it worries me that he's not going to trust that Kiefer isn't going to hurt him. When Kiefer does hit him with a toy, I just take the toy away from Kiefer, tell him firmly not to hit Cameron it hurts him. The second time he does it, I remove the toy from reaching distance and tell him the toy is in time-out. I know he's too young to understand what I'm doing and why, but if he wants his toys back, he needs to calm down. It does seem to work, cause when he gets his toy back he'll hand it to me nicely, or not approach Cameron while he's playing with it...at least for a little while until the lesson has been forgotten (which you'd expect to happen from a very young toddler). Meanwhile, I'll just pick Cameron up and try to distract him or cheer him up. I don't coddle him. I want him to learn that a little bang or booboo is ok and he's going to be fine. Kiefer takes a bunch of hits and punches from Cameron and he'll whine, but that only lasts as long as Cameron is grabbing and pulling, punching, or pinching him. I do the same to Cameron when he's too rough, but it's not as often, and Kiefer does not really seem too upset by it.

Kiefer will be rough with me too. He'll approach me with his cups and smack me across the face with them. Sometimes it's cause he trips all over things and the cups in his hands end up smacking me in the face, but other times he does it himself. I just take away the cups and do what I do with him for when he does this for Cameron. But, today he did it again after two times, I tossed the cups out of the pen. I was still consoling Cameron after he had taken his punches. Then Kiefer looked so disappointed he no longer had his cups to walk around with. He then had this look on his face and started to toss the rest of the cups out of the pen. What a cutie! Teehee, my fault there. He actually tossed his favorite doggy out and then cried after realizing he can't reach it.

Kiefer is so smart though. There's this tin bucket that Kiefer has learned to stand on in order to reach over the pen walls. I've been putting it in the middle of the pen so he can't get out or fall out. He now carries it to the side of the pen and stands on it and tries to get out. That amazed me how he figured that out.

So back to topic, am I doing enough to help teach a 14 month old to stop hitting people with things? Any other ideas?
Eliza - Wife to husband, Jason. Mother to twin boys, Cameron and Kiefer (6-24-08)

I love my Peanut M&Ms Cameron & Kiefer!!Eliza's Blog

Last edited by TheyGrowLikeWeeds; August 21st, 2009 at 10:34 AM.
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August 21st, 2009, 05:25 PM
tundrababy's Avatar Mega Super Twin Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 2,923
sorry don't have really any advice for you, sounds like you are doing a good job though! I can't imagine what its going to be like when the boys are that age
Jen, mom to Danika 6, and twins Owen & Rhys 3 (how did that happen!?!)

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August 23rd, 2009, 11:49 AM
*Mandy*'s Avatar Co-Host Moms of Multiples
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Location: Pittsburgh, PA
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I'm sorry Kiefer is being so rough.Can you take the buckets away maybe?My two year old is very aggressive and also plays very rough....i'm trying to teach him to play "nice" but i'm worried about this when the girls get here.
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