Log In Sign Up

I have a stupid question

Forum: Adoption


Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to [email protected].

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Adoption LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
May 11th, 2010, 07:50 PM
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennesee
Posts: 44
Hello ladies! I am mostly a lurker but hoping to join this board. I am thinking about adoption for a second child because I cannot have any more kids.

I have a potentially offensive question, but it is a huge concern.. Will I love my adopted child the same way I love my bio daughter? Is anyone else dealing with this? Also, my husband made a good point when we were talking about it- will my adopted child think that we don't love him/her as much even if we do??

I'm so sorry to ask such questions, but I figured you were the best ladies to ask.
Reply With Quote
May 12th, 2010, 10:13 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: My heart belongs in Washington DC
Posts: 6,415
Hello! welcome to our board! I dont have any children yet so I can't answer your question, but I hope the other girls on this board will be able to answer it, it's actually something that I've been wondering about myself.

Thank you to the wonderful ladies who mad the blinkies!

"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude..... These experiences, while often difficult to bear at the time, are percisely the kinds of experiences that stretch our understanding, build our character and increase our compassion for others."
Reply With Quote
May 13th, 2010, 09:03 AM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,847
Hey, sorry I haven't been on to answer your question!

I have a foster son who we are hoping we can adopt. I very much love him just as much as I love my biological daughter. In fact, for us, I loved him that much the first time they put him into my arms. There are moments when I've wondered if we were the right family for him, though, and I question myself a lot (he is special needs). Those moments are few though... mostly I just think of him as my son.

My DH had a harder time bonding with him. DH has a hard time bonding with anyone, though, and because of his special needs my son is harder for most people to bond with. So that's been a bit of a struggle.

I know there are women around who have been adopted themselves. I'll see if I can PM a few to answer your question about them feeling loved. I would think that there will always be moments when they say hurtful things about you not loving them (like teenagers will from time to time), but if you treat them all the same and love them all the same I can't imagine that'd be an ongoing issue.

GL in your journey!! Please keep us posted!!

Thank you to AlexAiden Mommy for my beautiful siggie!
Reply With Quote
May 13th, 2010, 11:38 AM
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennesee
Posts: 44
Thank you for your reply
Reply With Quote
May 14th, 2010, 01:20 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 28,175
Of my four kids, three are adopted, and I can honestly say that I love them all equally, I would die for any of them in a heartbeat.

Lucky mother to five!

Reply With Quote
May 14th, 2010, 04:52 PM
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennesee
Posts: 44
Thank you very much for your input. I figured I would love all my children the same, but I had to ask... It has been my biggest fear. I would hate for my adopted child to feel like I didn't love him/her the same way I love my bio daughter.
Reply With Quote

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:21 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0