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Forum: Waiting to Try to Conceive


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March 30th, 2011, 08:28 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Ontario Canada
Posts: 2,740
How old is too old to keep ttc? I am not getting married until 2012 and that means that I will be 34 and I don't think I would want to start trying right away. I have fertility treatments so it could take a while to get pregnant if at all. My family thinks you shouldn't try after 30, now I think that is not old to be trying at all but it has got me thinking. Is there an age that you shouldn't really keep trying? What age do you think you will stop trying??
MOM of 6!

Mom to Premies, IVF mom,
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March 30th, 2011, 08:32 PM
sweet.hun's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 7,694
I think it's really a personal decision! I would stop TTC after 40, but that is my own personal choice. Some of my friends have said that if they aren't married and knocked up by 30 then there's no point, but I say bull.
Shasta, 33 years old. Jesse (DH), 32 years old.
Daughters: Rylie 4 years old. Born 3/18/2013 & Taryn 9 months. Born 12/19/2016
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March 30th, 2011, 09:18 PM
taatie10's Avatar New Mommy & Pro Auntee
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Northern AZ
Posts: 5,895
You are considered Advanced Maternal Age or AMA if you will be 35 when you deliver. Which means risk of down syndrome is higher than if you were younger. If jumps to even greater once you are 40 or older.

Thank you for the amazing siggy *Kiliki*

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March 30th, 2011, 09:30 PM
1InSummerland's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: San Antonio, TX
Posts: 1,185
I think its a personal decision. My mother had my half-brother when she was in her 40s. I don't think there's anything wrong with having a child past any certain age as long as you talk to your doctor about the increased risks and if you have fertility treatments, I'm assuming you've already discussed that with your doctor?Its not like your chances of risk or complicaitons suddenly increase at any age either. And if you're worried about parenting past a certain age, I don't think it matters. I know more couples who raised children (their own or their grandchildren) in their 40s to 70s than I can count and they're some of the best parents I know. I think the experience that comes with age makes it easier to be more patient.

Thank you, Bokkechick, for my beautiful siggy.
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March 30th, 2011, 09:34 PM
(not so patiently) WTTC
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Southern CA
Posts: 2,203
I also think it is a personal choice. I just watched a documentary of a 70 yo woman who gave birth via IVF...It's not that I condone this, but she was a very spry 70 and had a whole family that was supportive of her and the baby.
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March 30th, 2011, 10:09 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,992
Wow, not past 30??? Thats a little much Considering I had my first at 30 and I do plan on having another in a couple years. I agree it is personal choice, of course past 35 you are at AMA and there are more risks, but it is definetly still within reach!!
For me, I want to start TTC our second child when I am 33/34

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March 31st, 2011, 01:13 AM
Two for More's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 121
I agree with those who say it is a personal choice. It's also a decision that is largely affected by circumstances -- if you don't meet a person with whom you'd like to raise a child until you're 30, then 30 is probably not going to be your cut-off date for TTC.

Risks do rise after age 35, and I think that's important to keep in mind. At the same time, there are many women who safely give birth to healthy babies well into their 40s. In addition to personal choice, and life circumstances, it's important to talk to your doctor about moving forward with TTC.

I personally have set a cut-off of 35 for myself. At the same time, I was lucky to meet my husband many years ago, and we have plenty of time to have as many children as we would like before 35 (assuming no fertility issues), so my personal choice has no bearing on what you should do, and is not meant to imply that you are 'too old' to try to have a baby, because I don't think you are by any means.
~ Jay ~

Happily married, and waiting to try

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March 31st, 2011, 02:19 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Phoenix, Az
Posts: 3,622
Stop TTC at 30?!?!? That seems crazy to me! My mom had me when she was 30 and my sister at 31 (my dad was 39 and 40 we when we were born). By the time I am done having kids I will be in my early-mid 30s.

If you know you want to have kids, it's always best to wait until YOU are ready, even if it's not until you are 30 or 35 or 40.

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March 31st, 2011, 07:23 AM
Cassie.S's Avatar Proud Mommy!
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 9,013
Yeah it's definitely a personal choice and should depend on each woman's own health. I will definitely still be TTC in my 30's, but will probably be done before 40. My mom had my youngest brother when she was 41, and there were more risks and that required more health checks and all that, but they are both just fine.
Cassie, wife to Andrew, mommy to Sophia (4), Landon (2) and expecting baby #3 in June!

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March 31st, 2011, 07:34 AM
Spero's Avatar Nice to meet you, I'm Kat
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 837
Oh my, I hope 30 isn't the cut off, since I will probably be 30 or 31 when we have our first, hopefully!!

I do think it's a personal choice though. I mean, there are a lot of variables that can affect when you TTC and it's better late than never! My grandma had my mom when she was in her 40s after my grandpa got back from the war and that was really old back then (my uncle was old enough to be my Mom's father, hehe) I'm glad they decided to TTC at an older age, otherwise I wouldn't be here!

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March 31st, 2011, 08:00 AM
Cait&AngelAbove's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 10,635
I really think it is a personal choice. I would love to be done having kids by the time I am in my early thirties.

Thank you so much Bokkechick for the perfect siggie!!!
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March 31st, 2011, 08:32 AM
Londons Butterfly's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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That is a personal choice, go with whatever age you feel comfortable with. Not everyone wants to have kids after their 30s or 40s.

Personally I decided I didn't want to have any after 30, but that is specifically because I had my first at 16 and I don't know if I can deal with a teenager and a newborn (my daughter is ADHD and bi-polar, and gorgeous so HS is going to be trouble lol).
Though I think that number might change as well, since I still want to be a surrogate. I want to wait until after we have our next baby and move to the states before I start that journey.

Scarlett Diane

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March 31st, 2011, 12:01 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: London England
Posts: 553
It really all depends on your fertile age. Some women at 40 have a fertifile age of 28, some at 28 have a fertile age of 40.

I am 35 now. I am looking to get my TR done sooner thant later of course because I am AMA. The risks of downes is greater but again this is all tested for.

1 in 5 pregnancies are with woman over the year of 30.
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March 31st, 2011, 12:11 PM
blessdmommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I believe Michelle Duggar is 47 or so....

It's a personal choice.
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March 31st, 2011, 01:06 PM
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 3
I'd like to be done by about 35 personally, but if I had gotten married later, early 40's would be fine with me. My Dad and uncle have had kids in their 50's! Of course they didn't have to deal with pregnancy firsthand.
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March 31st, 2011, 03:00 PM
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 320
i started young (19) so i would like to be done with children by age 30. i think women can have children at any age as long as they are healthy and going to be around long enough to see the child grow etc

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March 31st, 2011, 06:27 PM
MissusF's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Central CA
Posts: 3,722
I think it's a personal decision. It's hard for me to answer because I'm childless and 26. I have no idea how I'll feel once I'm in my 40's lol. However, the trend in my family and circle of friends is to wait until you're older (30's) and very secure and settled into a good career before having children. I feel a little young to be having one now even though I'm doing it anyway Honestly I wouldn't even bat an eye at someone in their forties having a baby.
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