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rough day & feel like a horrible mommy :(

Forum: Attachment Parenting


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September 30th, 2009, 08:37 PM
cln1812's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: La Porte, TX
Posts: 1,083
Today was really a rough day for me and had me struggling with my AP skills It just left me feeling like I'm not a good mommy to Tessa at all. I know she is a very high needs toddler. She has never been an easy or dream child though she is extremely bright (sometimes maybe too smart for her own good) and can be terribly sweet and cute too. But today was not a good day for either Tessa or me. She has lately been refusing to nap at all and today she fought sleep all afternoon until DH got home from work. I could tell she was sleepy by 1 PM; I'd nurse her & she'd get just this side of sleep and manage to twist out of my grip and run to the edge of the bed and get down. I put her in her stroller; she'd ride a few feet, then start crying (because she was fixing to fall asleep), she'd struggle so that she couldn't sleep; if I took her out to walk, she'd walk a yard or 2, then want to ride. I couldn't win no matter what I did. All DD wanted to do in the house was read books, but she was so tired, she'd turn the pages before I could read the words and then get mad that I wasn't reading and have a tantrum. I put her in the car, but all she'd do was flail her arms and legs and cry so she'd stay awake. I know all of this is likely brought on by teething. She is getting her 2 yr. molars, and I think the 3rd one is beginning to break the gum. But what in the world do you do when no matter what you try, nothing works? I even put DD in the bath early (because I needed a break come 5 PM after 4 hours of constant crying & whining) and she was happy for a few minutes (she normally LOVES her bath and would stay in there forever as long as the warm water was replenished) but then DD wanted me to do something with the bath toys and washcloth and I wasn't doing whatever she wanted (I couldn't understand what she was saying, that was the problem), then she began throwing things out of the tub so that was short-lived.

Really, I knew DD was teething and tired and needed a nap, but none of that was happening. Breastfeeding didn't help. Holding her didn't help. Going outside didn't help. What do you do when you're doing everything you can and your LO is crying & whining incessantly?

I was very nearly in tears by the time DH got home around 7 PM. It was such a rough day, I was beyond exhausted, plus AF had shown this morning so I was crampy, had a headache & a bit moody to start with. At times I felt like yelling at DD and ignoring her. She almost never plays independently unless she is working on a poopy diaper so even her good days are rough in that I've got to be "on" all the time without so much as a 5 minute break to myself. Bad days like today are just brutal.

I love my daughter but days like today make me wish she was a little less attached to me

My Ovulation Chart
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September 30th, 2009, 10:23 PM
blondie-lox's Avatar Do NOT feed the Troll
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: ON, Canada
Posts: 16,621
I don't know what to tell you but I'm sorry you're feeling like this. Do you give her anything to relieve the teething pain? Maybe that might help. Hugs!

Huge thanks to *Kiliki* for the FANTABULOUS new siggy!!
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October 1st, 2009, 06:57 AM
cln1812's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: La Porte, TX
Posts: 1,083
I tried the Hyland's teething tablets, but it didn't seem to help any.

My Ovulation Chart
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October 1st, 2009, 07:50 AM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,644
The only thing i can tell you is that i felt almost the same and also with AF two days ago. She wanted to sleep and whined like crazy but resisted it. In the end she did sleep on her own for 2 hours but helloooooo she woke up and started whining again. Nothing helped. It was not crying but whining. That constant murmur of sadness/boredom what have you really gets on my nerves. I was not a good mommy to her that day either. Did what i could but i was exhausted/in pain/crying myself....the only thing i can say is that those days exist. We must edure them. They come with the package. As we adults have our good and bad days so do babies/toddlers. More so for them since they can not express themselves when they need something and being tired doesn't make things easier either for them or for us that being also tired we fail to understand them. Needless to say that we are teething also......can't say anything else than just take heart mommy.....it's gonna be better tomorrow........for both of us......

" \m/ Now I’m riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I’ll cross the line forevermore \m/ "

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October 1st, 2009, 08:13 AM
ItalySarah's Avatar Proud Attached Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 11,408
I would try tylenol or motrin in addition to the teething tablets to see if that helps.

when I am nursing Bella to sleep I still have to swaddle her cause she will move her arms and keep herself awake. Can you try wrapping her in a blanket while you nurse her? Even if she cries a little, you are right there with her and she will go to sleep.

((HUGS)) Days like that are hard. I hope today is better for you!

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October 1st, 2009, 10:01 AM
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Finland
Posts: 4,481
Reading what you wrote I'd say that you did very well. She was being very hard to deal with and you tried for hours to think of what would please her. Many would have given up.

When I try to nurse DD for her nap I put her in the cradle position (just leave her feet to the side). That allows me to really pin her down because she will fight the nap. She pokes at her eyelids and kicks around to keep herself awake. Combining this with the boob singing and rocking I have some success but sometimes I have to fight her for up to an hour (and a lot of the time my patience wears out before then).

Hvor er toalettet?
Skal vi danse?
Gratulerer med fødselsdagen
Luftputefartøyet mitt er fullt av ål
Ett språk er aldri nok
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