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Frustration w/ others....Rant with AP decisions

Forum: Attachment Parenting


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October 12th, 2009, 07:19 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 2,516
So, i read some things on another board today that got my blood boiling. I won't say what it is or my opinions on their situation. I just wanted to post to make sure Im not the crazy one here. My daughter is 3yrs old BTW. So, I don't do the "crying it out", I co-sleep, and I just don't do any crazy parenting techniques like trying to potty train a newborn, or lock my child in their rooms. I just have the mechinism that is what i refer to as my heart that hurts soooooooooooooooooo bad when I hear my girl cry out for me. I have no clue how people could let their babies cry for half an hour to the point of vomiting. I just don't get it! If my daughter stirs, talks in her sleep or slightly cries I know the difference and in seconds she's back to sleep but I won't let her sit and freak out and think that I am not there for her. Sorry for the rant....i just don't get it. Sorry for my strong feelings and opinions...I feel that my daughter is well adjusted and is the most pleasant, sweet, giving child and I don't think that i have done anything wrong in the way that I parent....although some (and some in my family) do think is wrong.
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October 12th, 2009, 07:51 PM
*Bobbie*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Rochester, NY
Posts: 15,851

your daughter is beautiful. I wouldn't let what you are dealing with get you down. She is your child and you are the one raising her. It might help to find a AP group in your area if there is one. Some APers in real life might be just what you need right now
Bobbie mom to : Jeremy (23) Amanda (20) Matthew ( 6) and Daniel (4).... RYAN DAVID 1/4/14 8lbs 10oz 20 3/4 inches!!! My miracle happened!
step-mom to: Stephany (24) and Krista (21)
step-grandma to: Wesley, Rosemarie, Scarlett

On 1/31/12 at exactly 16 weeks pregnant Noah came too soon.
If you would like to see pictures of my sweet (but tiny) boy they can be viewed at www.caringbridge.org/visit/noahdarrohn they aren't the easiest pictures to look at but I am willing to share them with anyone who would like to see them <3
On August 2, 2012 we lost Sarah at 17 weeks. Her pictures can be viewed at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/sarahdarrohn
There is no known explanation for my losses.

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October 12th, 2009, 08:08 PM
Posts: n/a
Sounds like you fit in here!

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October 13th, 2009, 12:20 PM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,644
Your daughter is a beautiful and lucky child .....don't listen to anybody. Just listen to your heart.....

" \m/ Now Iím riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way Iíll cross the line forevermore \m/ "

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October 13th, 2009, 04:47 PM
ItalySarah's Avatar Proud Attached Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 11,408
I completely understand how you feel. I hope you will feel comfortable here on the board!

CIO is a very touchy subject for a lot of people, understandably. I think each parent makes the best decision for their family based on the information they know.

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October 13th, 2009, 06:48 PM
cln1812's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: La Porte, TX
Posts: 1,083
I just bite my tongue...it's hard though. I feel the same way you do about the issue. We don't CIO and still BF and cosleep. I actually stopped going to my mom's group because I felt I just didn't fit in. I was having a hard time containing myself when the moms were going on about how young their new baby could be before CIO (basically I felt that they couldn't wait until their LO was ready to CIO and STTN) and kept remarking that DD was awfully attached to me and I should just stop holding her and let her cry...sigh...I need to find another mom's group but hopefully more friendly towards AP and extended breastfeeding.

My Ovulation Chart
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October 14th, 2009, 06:28 AM
mgm78's Avatar Zoe's mom Meredith
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: PA
Posts: 17,089
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well, i totally agree with you

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October 14th, 2009, 07:10 AM
Tofu Bacon
Posts: n/a
Sometimes its just best to avoid those boards if they upset you so much. Just keep on doing what you feel is best for your babe, and sometimes people will even notice how an AP'd child sleeps and thrives just as well as a non-AP'd child
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October 19th, 2009, 01:15 AM
beck12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 12,330
I am sorry. It stirs up something in me terribly too. I have read posts on CIO where other moms are supporting a wavering mom on how she has to hold tough & not talk, not eye contact, just changes pj's & vomited on sheets & walk away again. It does something to me internally I just cannot explain because of course the first thing that happens involuntarily is that I imagine that child as MY child & it breaks my heart into a million million pieces. They are just too little to understand that you can love them, be there for them & walk away & act like they are invisible basically while they are totally melting down & basically begging to be responded to - so how are they supposed to interpret that? It kills me.
B - Crazy momma to my two boys
We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. ~Gloria Steinem

If a man has been his mother's undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it. ~Sigmund Freud
My mom is a neverending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. ~Graycie Harmon
Don't wait to make your son a great man - make him a great boy. ~Author Unknown
You don't raise heroes, you raise sons. And if you treat them like sons, they'll turn out to be heroes, even if it's just in your own eyes. ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. ~Irish Proverb
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. ~Erich Fromm
Children need love, especially when they do not deserve it. - Harold Hulbert
Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of little children. ~William Makepeace Thackeray
God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb
The best conversations with mothers always take place in silence, when only the heart speaks. ~Carrie Latet

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