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feeling alone

Forum: Attachment Parenting


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  • 2 Post By Eowyn

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May 20th, 2013, 06:33 PM
Eowyn's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,400
I feel like the only attachment mommies i know only have really little ones...
babies and toddlers- and most of them I only know online through Facebook or groups like this site.
Im glad they exist of course-but I wish I knew some in real life!

Now that my kids are 4 and 6 (wow the time flies!) I feel pretty alone in our lifestyle as
gentle, natural parenting family.
DH has really been willing to follow my lead, since I am a SAHM he
is respectful of when we disagree on situations and defers to me most of the time because I'm the one home with them all day and know their limitations and best direction for them(most of the time.)
So of course I'm thankful for his support...

but the rest of my friends and family with young ones are polar opposites with most things.
Its so hard feeling like I'm the only one and I get so much judgment-especially with family!

They either are totally permissive and do nothing but scream at their kids and then get upset when their kids scream back!
or on the other hand-relatives that are hard core baby/child training methods that bring me to tears!

Sometimes I wish I knew just ONE AP mommy! or even anything that comes close!
The one friend I have with children the same age as mine is very AP but lives so far away!
The other AP friend I have- she is a lovely lady but we just don't "click" ya know? like at all!
LOL! just my luck! I guess it's too much to ask for an AP mommy friend!

Thanks for letting me vent! I know I've been away for awhile!
Ive been lurking! tsk tsk tsk !
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May 20th, 2013, 07:57 PM
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 150
I hear ya! Although we do have an infant, our older daughter is 5 and the way we parent is pretty different than her the way her friends are parented. Of course, it gets prickly because her best friend's mom allows her daughter to say things like "You're stupid," or "You're mean," or "You're dumb," or "I hate you." And they yell at each other constantly!

DD has begun to pick those things up and it drives me crazy!!!!! I sound like a broken record. Every time she says something like that, my one and only response is "That hurts my feelings when you say that. We don't talk like that in our family."

Have you checked into Meetup.com? When we first moved out here, I found an awesome Natural Moms group via Meetup and we all have kiddos close in age. I still hang out with the girls I met nearly 5 years ago. I highly recommend it!!! Good luck!
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May 20th, 2013, 11:00 PM
alittlelost's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 6,905
I understand hon. It took me years to meet another AP mommy friend and unfortunately her life is so busy that we never get together, though we get along on a personal level and agree on soooo many things AND we both home school.

My kids are 6 1/2, almost 8, and 5.
Thank you Jaidynsmum for the beautiful siggy!
Check out the Attachment Parenting Board for Effective Parenting Solutions.
PM me if have questions about autism, TTC gender swaying, natural childbirth, going "vaccine-free", or if you are looking for gentle discipline advice.
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May 21st, 2013, 01:33 AM
IronMamma's Avatar -Child Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 4,286
I completely understand. I am not lying when I say this; I have gotten crap from every single family member because of the way I parent. I was told I am creating something I will regret because I am anti CIO, etc. It's heart breaking and plain annoying. I also do not know any AP parent IRL besides myself and DH. It sucks. Drake is 17 months old and the few people that I have hung with always kinda give me a weird look when he needs me and I respond right away.

Thank you *Kiliki* for my perfect siggy

When you know better, you do better. And when you do better, you know HINTA.

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May 21st, 2013, 04:59 AM
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,755
I know how it feels! I'm so glad I have at least this place to talk about parenting. I feel like there's not a single person I know that I can really be honest with about how I parent.

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May 21st, 2013, 05:47 AM
Eowyn's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,400
Thanks Ladies!
Sometimes just being reminded I'm not alone in some of these struggles does help.

Im probably over stressing because we're moving this weekend.
We're moving closer to my parents and family and I hope that the more daily interaction my kids have with my parents and relatives that they will get to see more of what I see-that AP works!!
( everyone keeps saying I'm ruining my kids, well, they are getting a lot older now-Ive been "ruining them" since they were born-when exactly am I supposed to start seeing all these negative affects!? )
alittlelost and IronMamma like this.
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May 21st, 2013, 11:44 AM
TreeTog's Avatar Love is in the Air!
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: La Porte, TX
Posts: 2,326

I know what you mean about wanting friends who parent like you do. I have a 5yo and a 2yo. My 5yo has Autism and you can't just do things with him and a lot of my friends who are parents don't get it.


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May 21st, 2013, 05:42 PM
IronMamma's Avatar -Child Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 4,286
I have an idea. Let's some how all meet up and have a huge play date. I am sure we would all get along!

Thank you *Kiliki* for my perfect siggy

When you know better, you do better. And when you do better, you know HINTA.

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