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-   -   Advice for a friend... (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f341-home-birth/1483308-advice-for-friend.html)

Zoostergirl March 18th, 2009 04:51 PM

Advice for a friend...
My friend is hoping for a home water birth. Her DH was previously on board, but as her due date draws near (she's about 36 weeks) he's changing his mind. He's afraid of the mess. He says he's okay with the homebirth if she hires someone to come in and clean up afterwards. She's hurt and disappointed. She asked for my advice but I don't have any. But I hoped you guys might.

(I'm a member of the Feb 09 PR and the BF board)

Martina March 18th, 2009 06:05 PM

Re: Advice for a friend...
is she doing it unattended??
I always had midwives with home birth and there was never any mess left, they cleaned it all up, they even washed all the towels and everything that was used at birth and dried in dryer LOL

inyourhonor March 18th, 2009 06:06 PM

Re: Advice for a friend...
The mess was none of mine or my husbands worry. Our midwives took care of us, let us enjoy our newest family member and cleaned up. My husband did help with getting rid of the tub water, but that was his choice.

Have they discussed this with their midwife? If not, they should. They need to have open communication on how their midwives work during labor, delivery and post-delivery. I made sure I knew how my midwives did things. They followed my cues and after our son was born, they got me to my bed and let me enjoy him. They made us something to eat, they did laundry and stayed for about 2 hours afterwards and did the clean up.

Honestly, if your friend has everything her midwife asked she have to be prepared, a mess really won't be there. The most that will need to be done is draining and putting away the tub.

Tell her at her next appointment to bring this up with her midwife, don't make him out to be a bad guy, just casually ask what is done with the clean up process.

Mommy2Amara&Kayori March 19th, 2009 02:08 PM

Re: Advice for a friend...
our midwife cleaned up EVERYTHING, she even did all my laundry, and I mean all of it, I had a could loads of kids clothes to do and she did them

Ok wait the only thing she didn't do was empty the tub, we had to do that, but she cleaned it

_Brandy_ March 31st, 2009 11:12 PM

Re: Advice for a friend...
I would say what the others are saying. Is there a midwife? If so, mess will be her domain.

Otherwise, if unassisted, it is less to clean if having a waterbirth anyway.

soImarriedAnerd April 1st, 2009 12:26 AM

Re: Advice for a friend...
:ditto: MW clean up better then I would I hear! LOL

OrangeBee April 1st, 2009 08:34 PM

Re: Advice for a friend...
yup yup! my sisters midwife did all clean up and even did laundry for her.

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