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-   -   Family road blocks *A Long Rant* (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f341-home-birth/1771734-family-road-blocks-long-rant.html)

flitabout November 13th, 2009 04:17 PM

Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
My SIL who was very hb positive, seems to have changed her tune today. She says to me as I run in to pick up my records from one of my C/S for my m/w. She says why don't you just go to a hospital. That way you can rest without the kids! Wow I thought she knew me better. They have tried to drug me and still I don't sleep or relax in the hospital. Then she says what about your bed? You will need to get... I didn't let her finish. I said a Birth kit? I got that handled. My m/w has a company that she works with. I said and besides I am going with a water birth. She proceeds to tell me about the dog, got it covered he's going to the kennel. A super protective 100lb German Sheppard that would bite anybody that came near me is not my idea of a good labor buddy! LOL. Then she tells me that my m/w will make me lock up my cats for 2 days. This is just Joanna's way of saying I shouldn't do this. She says what are you going to do with the kids, because they will end up hating the baby if they see how much pain you are in! Then I also get to hear about which of her kids had meconium, and that midwives don't have suction to get it out of the lungs, and to make sure that she carries the antibotics that you must give them. 1) if we get into trouble the hospital is 6 blocks away, 2) are we in the dark ages??? Come on like I am stupid. I wouldn't put myself or my baby in any kind of risk. She has told me that she has had NCB with all of her's. No she has had really easy vaginal births. She has had pit and epidurals, with all of them!
She just doesn't seem to realize that I have more risk of not only a rcs and the subsequent problems, but the drugs that they push on you, even my rupture rate goes up in a hospital. Why doesn't anybody see that I want a safe healthy birth in my safe comfortable home. She also told me that my m/w and doula would encourage the children to basically be up my butt right up until the end. I have the kids covered, I have the dogs covered, I trust my midwife, I trust my body and I will trust my birth! Get over it and just mommy the support she need people.

lhug_nar November 13th, 2009 04:43 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
Totally understand what you're going through. I get it all the time from my IL's and my side, especially my MIL and mother though. Neither one of them think that the boys should be able to be here when the baby is born. None of them think that it's a good idea for me to even think about having a hb because I should "just go ahead with a rcs and be done with it so everyone knows when the baby is coming". Not gonna happen. You'll get 200% respect and support from me!!!

WishingStar November 14th, 2009 05:50 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
Sorry she's treating you that way. I've been lucky so far in only getting a little bit of crap from people. Stay strong!

Martha83 November 15th, 2009 09:37 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
HUGS...I can only imagine what we'll go through if we end up pregnant with a fifth and then a HB ( i hope)...people were flipping over the birthing center we had on number four...they'll just fall over dead when I tell them we are doing it HERE...HUGS...

flitabout November 16th, 2009 03:54 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
Oh family is so fun to deal with! DH told her to knock it off. That she was just jealous because she didn't do it first! I was floored when he said that! When I went back and did the research on everything she said. , I found out and I emailed all of the info back to her, it made me feel tuns better knowing that not only had my gut told me what was right, so did the research!

geogeek November 17th, 2009 08:31 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
I am sorry to hear that she is trying to push that on you! This is the #1 reason why I will not be telling people, hopefully until after the fact. You are awesome to not let her finish. Your body, your choice.

Twinkle November 18th, 2009 10:24 AM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
Good for you for doing your research and sending it to her. Thats awesome. I'm really sorry you don't have support of your family, I didn't have much support either. I did have a few close friends who were very supportive and that made up for it thankfully.

~*Bethy*~ November 18th, 2009 02:27 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
Ive had a lot of friends turn on me when I told them - their scared. My mom was concerned, but Ive given her all the facts, and she said "well, I get to be there dont I?" of course mother :p I figure everyone has a say, and the only ones that matter, are the people who will be there for the labor and delivery. I hope your SIL changes her tune soon, but in the mean time, tell her to back off unless she has something nice to say!


flitabout November 20th, 2009 01:21 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
Well I haven't talked to her in a few days. It's been a little rough the last few days. I had some bleeding and they brought me in for a u/s. They think I might have the beginnings of a placenta accreta. Long story short if it doesn't move up before my next u/s on 1/6/10. I will not be getting my hba3c. So I am praying that it does. I don't want another c/s let alone the chance of loosing my uterus.

Twinkle November 20th, 2009 01:41 PM

Re: Family road blocks *A Long Rant*
((Hugs)) How scary, I'll be praying for you. Please keep us posted!!

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