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Vandertramp September 8th, 2010 08:03 PM

Need Some Reassurance
So I do not know if it is because I am in the home stretch...but I am starting to get a bit nervous about my homebirth plan, and the "what ifs" keep creeping in. I sort of feel like I keep having to convince myself. I am not worried about pain or being able to deliever, I am just nervous if there is an unanticipated emergency (even though we live less than 2 miles from a hospital...), or that when I actually go into labor, the what ifs will creep in and cause me to panic and fight labor. I know that statistics, studies, and was very comfortable with the descision to have a home birth, I do not know why suddwnly I am getting so nervous. All my friends who have done a home birth always have seemed so confident, I feel weird that I have some concerns. Has anyone delt with this and how did you get over it.

inyourhonor September 8th, 2010 08:26 PM

Re: Need Some Reassurance
The truth, I was confident face to face but had my panics behind closed doors. I'm sure your friends had their concerns and worries as well.

I was very nervous for my 2nd home birth. Mainly the anxiety of when I'd go into labor and the pain again. I had my 1st home births pain still fresh in my mind and the anxiety of it got the best of me.

But when I did go into labor I was calm. I was content. I was okay. It will be okay :) worries and concerns are completely normal! Especially yours. It will be okay, promise!

CameraLinds September 9th, 2010 01:29 AM

Re: Need Some Reassurance
Don't feel weird you have concerns....Anxiety and fear for any type of birth is normal....it's the typical mama bear gene...wanting to do anything/everything to protect your lil bear cub and have nothing happen to either of you, etc. It's a primal extinct ;)

So yes I did experience that with DS....I was so freaking scared/worried I'd end up at the hospy with a caesearn, which was the last thing I wanted...but after my birthing classes I changed my thought in regard to thinking like that- thinking that the hopsy and c-section are there for a reason, there to help in case of an emergency and that would be the only reason we'd be transporting there. So i had to remind myself that they are there to help, and if that's what happens it's because it was what would be best for me and the baby, not matter how scared of surgery and hospitals i may be, it would be for the best- for us all to be safe and healthy with just a change in the birth.

Reminding myself and trying to think calmly of the above has helped and reminding myself it's ok and normal to be worried and have anxieties about birth. It's human nature ;) I'm sure your friends who had HBs and were confident secretly had some fears that they didn't share, as most people think that if they share their fears with others, especially about a HB they think someone will tell them they shouldn't have a HB and go to the hopsital instead. (i know that would be the case for me...)

So hang in there! everything happens for a reason and I'm sure all will be a'ok whatever happens, but hopefully you too will get your homebirth.

sodagirl September 9th, 2010 01:59 AM

Re: Need Some Reassurance
I was nervous before hand too. I told myself that I needed to stay home though - because given the studies it was the safest place to be - and if I went to the hospital (without some sort of reason) it would be because that's what 'everyone' thinks is safer. I needed to stick to the actual safer choice.
And my baby did have serious breathing problems after she was born and was transferred to the hospital - but she is FINE. I'm still happy about my choice and I would do it again. I think she did so well despite her problems because she had no stress or trauma at birth - and I was able to cope with a sick baby and breast feed and bond with no trouble because we had such a good birth experience and she got to nurse right away and everything.

GranolaMamaOf3 September 9th, 2010 07:51 PM

Re: Need Some Reassurance
A few weeks ago, I had some very similar fears...It was right about the time I was nesting like crazy, and stressing over everything!! (I still nest now, but not quite as extensively).

I agree with the mama bear analogy. I think it's only natural to question any/all decisions at some point or another. We all want what's best for our babies!

I don't have any real advice to offer...For me, time has helped, and I'm much more at ease with it all again. Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone!

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