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glasscandie October 15th, 2006 05:50 PM

I am going to look through the homeschooling links that're posted on here, and will collect information that way too, but I was wondering if you girls could give me some advice on talking to my husband.

I've been thinking about homeschooling since I was pregnant. The reason being, my husband's in the Army so we move around a lot and are not always necessarily in the best school districts. Also, when our service is up in 2010, that'll be just around the time that my daughter will be entering school-age; more than likely, for the job that DH does in the Army, we'll be moving to D.C. to find a similiar civilian job. I don't know *too* much about DC, but I've been there, and have done a little research, and I do know the school systems (at least, some of them) aren't that great, particularly in the city. And if we choose not to get out in 2010 and extend his contract, we'll be forced to move again.

I thought that homeschooling would be a great option in either case, but when I (very briefly) broached the subject with my husband he was opposed, saying "Homeschooling kids turn out weird". Now, please don't take offense to this, his statement merely reflects his lack of education on this issue, and he really is a smart guy.

I was just wondering if anyone had any stats or opinions off the top of their head that could be used when I do sit down to talk with my husband about this. I know I'm sort of jumping the gun a bit, my DD just turned 1, but probably around 2 or so I could begin to teach her formally. I guess any way you look at it I'm jumping the gun lol

Thanks so much!

KarateMom October 15th, 2006 08:06 PM

Hi! First off, let me welcome you to the board!! I've seen your posts on other boards and I'm glad you decided to visit us here. I don't think you're jumping the gun at all by beginning to think about HS-ing early. It's better to have your research done in advance, I believe, and there is certainly enough info out there to keep you busy for the next four years! DH and I began talking about HS-ing before we even had kids!

As far as convincing your DH, I think that one of the best ways to go about it is to gather research about the better quality of education that your kids would get, as compared to the PS system. I know that the Home School Legal Defense Association has many articles about that issue and they can be found at http://www.hslda.org.

Now, I don't know how to convince him that your kids aren't going to turn out weird other than for you to say that you know a TON of ladies at JM who homeschool and THEIR kids aren't weird!! :lol: I think that "socialization" is the most common issue that non-homeschoolers have with homeschooling because everyone thinks that kids who are homeschooled are going to turn out warped or something! (As though all of the kids who are in public school are so "normal"!) I don't really know how to get someone's mind around that issue...someone else might have some better input on that.

I know that there are many homeschooling groups and co-ops out there that provide classes and field trips and even sports teams for homeschooling families to participate in, so maybe he would best be convinced by seeing some websites from those groups. (Did that make sense?) I'd suggest googling homeschooling groups in D.C. and the surrounding areas (since that's most likely where you'll be living) so that he can see what options would be available to your family.

Please feel free to come back lots and lots and ask tons of questions!

joandsarah77 October 15th, 2006 09:03 PM


I would find all the local possibilities for socializing that you can. Such as what Homeschool groups are around, any classes for homeschoolers, or other types of social things for kids. Hopefully your area will have a lot of things which you can write down to show your dh. Also does he actually know any kids who are homeschooled? If you join a local hs group you may be able to make some friends and let dh see they are not weird.
Maybe he knows some who went through homeschooling 15 years ago or something, well let him see that hs has changed since then. Also does he know any kids who went through ps and are weird? lol most of the weird nerds he knew are probably working for mircro soft and raking it in now. :lol: If there are news items around about bad things happening in local ps's then I would point those out. I think the social thing can be one of the hardest thing for some dh to get over, particuly if they were on a high school sport team and were really popular for that. They don't want to see there kids 'missing' out. But theses days homeschoolers have there own teams, and depending were you live still play on school teams. The good thing is you have lots of time to work on him. I think you just have to hold in your own enthusiasm and do it slowly bit by bit by dropping 'gems' into his mind. Most men seem best if given a tiny nugget to think on before another is given lol. Hopefully he will have come around to your side by the time your child is a few years older. if say Kindergarten enrolment is looming and he's still unsure then I would push for a years trial run, then a revaluation at the end of it. What you want for your dc education is just as important as what he wants.
Stick around and keep posting, your more then welcome.

Miguelsmommy October 15th, 2006 10:56 PM

I had my husband read "dumbing us down". I also showed him all the free/ low cost sport and club there are. Cheerleading, soccer, Bowling, and sometimes acting, boxing, hockey, girlscouts/boyscouts, Softball, Church and the list can go on and on. Then show ed him all the things he could do with a tuition less then $40 a month (what you would spend on luch money) like dance or karate. On top of that there are libarry programs, summer camps and other summer ativities. That's before all the activities provided when joining a HomeSchool group or volentering. Socalization is one of they main reasion people give for not homeschooling but I find it's one of the easiest to solve. Right now my son goes to Preschool 2 x a week to make friends because he can't join sports yet.

glasscandie October 16th, 2006 12:55 AM

I guess one of the main things *I'm* worried about (and surely if I am, my DH is as well, tho maybe hasn't verbalized it) - is the fact that my daughter has a skin disorder, and while THAT affects my thinking in no way what-so-ever, I'm afraid at some point she'll say "Did you want to homeschool me because I look different?" or even if she doesn't SAY it, will think it. And it's certainly not the case - I just don't want her to be held back by public school!

Miguelsmommy October 16th, 2006 09:41 AM

I already tell miguel I'm homeschooling him because he's smart, asks a lot of questions, He likes waking up late and playing. I haven't ever told him part of the resion is medical conserns. If she asks you can point out all the things that are advantages. Mabe let her "test out" a day or week at school.

I have cerible palsy. I know it's not a skin condition but as long as it's not shyed away from or treated as an issue you'll probably not have that much issue with her feeling she's diffrent. I think often adults say meaner things then kids. My mom use have people tell her I'm like because She must have drank or shook me. Kids are usually just courious the wierdest think a girl has asked me in elementary if I was trampled by a horse when I was a baby. only as I got older did I notice adults though I was not as smart as I am because of my handycap. Sorry I went OFF topic

Niamh ૐ October 16th, 2006 05:23 PM

My husband reacted the same way when I first brought up homeschooling. His little half-brother was homeschooled for a couple years, but his brother's mom (my husband's step-mom) was way overprotective and sheltered him. Now he is very dependant on his mom, even though he's 20. I had to explain that that doesnt happen when homeschooling is done right. Homeschooling isnt about sheltering your child and keeping them locked off from the "real world" and civilization.

After I shared my research with my husband and explained homeschooling to him, the socialization options, curriculum ideas, etc etc he came around to it... it took a couple months for him to get comfortable with the idea... but he finally did. Now he agrees with me that homeschooling will probably be the best option for us. (btw, my husband is also in the military... and plans to stay in for the full 20 years)

Also, you're not jumping the gun... my first child is still in the womb, lol.

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