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-   -   Talk me off the edge! -- update :) (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f257-natural-childbirth/2619521-talk-me-off-edge-update.html)

mamatomany January 28th, 2013 03:54 PM

Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
So, I've delivered five big babies with no meds whatsoever, and am about to have our last, number six. My last three labors have been quick.

I have horrible back labor every time, but honestly laboring is not a big deal to me -- it's the pushing stage that literally feels like I'm being ripped apart and I just find myself dreading it! I'm so tempted to try to get some kind of pain releif this time. However, (a) I'm not comfortable with the risks and (b) in all honesty I probably won't have time. But I want it so bad!! Tell me why I shouldn't!

So, 12 days late I woke up at 1:15 in the morning with a strong contraction. Got to the hospital at a 10 with a cervical lip. Labored briefly on all fours to get rid of the lip. I delivered in a semi-seated position which surprisingly ended up being the most effective for my small pelvic opening and he was delivered after three pushing contractions. It was, as expected, very painful. But the whole thing last only an hour and 15 minutes and I was glad I'd decided to go natural one last time since there's no way I could have gotten any pain meds it was going so quickly.

He weighed 9 lbs 6 oz and the l&d nurse, who was really wonderful and pushed on my hip bones to help with the pain and baby's descent, said that my pelvis is particularly small which is why pushing has always been so awfully painful.

Anyway, thanks for the encouragement. I'm really glad I didn't cave to the dread :).

Kelllilee January 28th, 2013 09:30 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
First off, have you tried different positions for pushing? If you get pain medication you will likely have no choice but laying on your back, which makes pushing harder and more difficult.

Also, consider "laboring down" to shorten the pushing phase.

Now, consider the negatives to getting pain medication.
*possibly a harder/longer pushing phase (albeit with less pain)
*longer recovery post birth
*possible side effects to baby (sleepiness and breastfeeding difficulties)
*emotionally, will you regret it?
*is that short window of pain worth it?

I would also suggest some visualization to help you relax and feel more comfortable with that phase since being tense or nervous will make it worse. I have had similar fears about the pushing phase (I'm terrified of a long pushing phase because mine have all been super short). I did some visualization exercises with a local doula and it really helped.

therevslady January 29th, 2013 04:44 AM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
Girl, You can do it! Get in the water to push that baby out! It will help chill that sensation down. I'm pretty sure that you all the side effects of the epidural and narcotics don't really help with what you are looking for. Just keep your mind and heart open to a new experience. You have enough kids to know that each birth can be unique. This is the only time you will do this dance with this baby. Do your best to give it every opportunity to a safe birth, and that includes not excluding the opportunity for a normal/natural birth. You've got this!

joeysmomma January 29th, 2013 06:02 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
Stay strong! You've done it 5 times, you can do it once more!

ashj_1218 January 30th, 2013 12:57 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
I am with you. Obviously I haven't done it five other times, but pushing is my least favorite part of all the labor process. I am truly scared of it this time.

But truthfully, it is so short. You can handle ANYTHING for those few minutes it takes to push your baby out. Just keep remembering how you will feel when he/she pops out and that pain is a distant memory. You really can do it, you have proven it over and over again.

And I agree with the suggestion of only pushing when you feel that undeniable urge. I do think it made my second pushing go easier than my first. I think that is what is meant by "laboring down," not just pushing when you get to 10.

I hope it goes smoothly and you are updating us soon!

mamatomany January 31st, 2013 02:48 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
Thanks so much ladies for taking the time to respond!

I'm 40+5 today and have definitely resigned myself to not asking for meds. It helped that a lady in my DDC just had the headaches and bp issues with her epi, and really, do I want to just switch one misery for a med-induced one?

Anyway, I know it's not going to feel good, but feeling great afterwards and having an alert and healthy baby are definitely worth the brief misery. My last labor was scary short, so I'm hoping that I won't even be able to push until the baby's about to fall out :).

I'll try to update when he gets around to showing his face!

GranolaMamaOf3 January 31st, 2013 02:57 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
You can do it Mama! I can't wait to hear of his arrival!

andi2284 February 2nd, 2013 07:03 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
You can do it, just remember how incredibly STRONG you are, mama! ;) I disliked the pushing phase too, but with my last labor, I felt way more in control with pushing than I did with my second. I think a lot of it was because my fast labor led to an unassisted birth (I had to even yell to my DH to come catch the baby) and that helped me feel completely uninhibited so I could focus on laboring and pushing.

raniaviv February 5th, 2013 07:23 AM

Re: Talk me off the edge!
there is a wonderful drug free product that might be able to help you called Laboraide. Google it :)

mamatomany February 11th, 2013 10:35 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
Update in first post

Kelllilee February 11th, 2013 10:45 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)

ashj_1218 February 12th, 2013 07:38 AM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
Yay!! I am glad it went quick and was successful for you :) Congrats on a bundle of joy!

therevslady February 12th, 2013 10:29 AM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
WONDERFUL! I am so glad everything went so smoothly! Way to go birthing a baby over 9lbs with a small pelvis! Goes to show how awesome our bodies truly are! You are inspirational!

alittlelost February 12th, 2013 07:14 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
great update! congrats! the pushing stage is the worst part for me too :(

GranolaMamaOf3 February 12th, 2013 08:26 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)

Originally Posted by ~~Que~~ (Post 27085011)
WONDERFUL! I am so glad everything went so smoothly! Way to go birthing a baby over 9lbs with a small pelvis! Goes to show how awesome our bodies truly are! You are inspirational!

I second this!! Way to go mama! Congratulations and happy Babymoon to you!

Counting our Blessings February 15th, 2013 05:44 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
Way to go Mama!!!

daneeleigh February 17th, 2013 10:52 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
Glad it went so smoothly. So jealous of a quick labor.

keekopeeko February 19th, 2013 02:06 PM

Re: Talk me off the edge! -- update :)
What a great update!

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