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-   -   How would I know? (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f133-pregnancy-and-motherhood-after-loss/124543-how-would-i-know.html)

iamkc December 29th, 2005 03:25 PM

So with previous losses, I've had no clues until RIGHT before the actual miscarriage--no cramping, spotting, loss of symptoms, nothing. I just start bleeding and it's over. For the later loss, I had the ultrasounds, but other than being really sick, which would be normal for a healthy pregnancy, nothing was really wrong--unless you saw the u/s's.

How would I tell, then? Will I just start bleeding and that's it again? UGH! This is so infuriating, not being able to tell. I FEEL pregnant...very much so. I have no painful cramping, but that uncomfortable, gross ache that I get around AF that makes me want to crawl into a hole.

I'm sorry...and it won't do any good to tell me to relax. Hehe. Not gonna happen. I wish I could, but even trying to go to sleep at night, all sorts of horrible thoughts pop into my head!!!

Anyone have any advice/encouragement, anything?

Sorry...I'm going to be this panicky the whoooooooole time. Bet you all can't wait! :P

soontobemommyto3 December 29th, 2005 04:12 PM

I wish I knew! I've heard of so many people who have had missed m/c where they still felt very pregnant and found out later that the baby had no h/b. That is what I worry about the most. Just going in and not seeing the h/b since that is what happened with Cassie. :(

I would rather have bleeding and cramping and know something is wrong then have the u/s that shows no h/b.

I know I'm not going to relax either. I'm so cautious right now I'm almost living in denial about being pregnant. I just don't want to get hurt again :(

Ethans_Mommy December 29th, 2005 08:16 PM

The only help I can offer is to let you know I feel the same way! Minor aches and pains throughout the day and that is enough to scare me! So we are in this together!!! If it is good news for you, hopefully it will be for me too and visa versa! :)

iamkc December 30th, 2005 07:04 AM

Susan--I'm the same way. If something is going to go wrong, I would rather it go wrong NOW and with all the bells, whistles, and flair it possibly can so I don't hold out hope. I would rather just gush blood and be in agony, to be honest, than to go in and see no heartbeat or something else equally devastating. Ugh.

Stephanie--If I have too many pains, I get nervous, and if I have none, I get nervous. There's going to be no pleasing me until the baby is actually OUT of me, healthy and happy. (I know that HAVING kids is another worry, but at least I can SEE what's going on and hold him/her...does that make sense?)

Here's hoping that we manage to make it through pregnancy with sanity intact...

Blessings B December 30th, 2005 08:46 AM

I think I have just put it all out of my mind, not my dreams. I am keeping very busy , because I too am so scared of loss. B

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