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-   -   Doula (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f133-pregnancy-and-motherhood-after-loss/2674104-doula.html)

melissalaw August 22nd, 2013 08:11 AM

Has any one every used one or does anybody plan on using one in the future? I am hoping to have a delivery with no pain medication at all but I'm just not sure how I'm going to get through it and I'm not sure how much help DH is going to be. So I was wondering if someone like a Doula would be worth the money or not.

EverydayJoy August 22nd, 2013 08:18 AM

Re: Doula
Well I almost had a doula, hah. I was all set up to have my DH's cousin be my doula, she is certified and all that. But she got some sort of viral throat infection a couple days before I went into labor. She offered to have another lady from her doula friends come and do it, but I just didn't feel like I wanted someone I didn't know at all to be there with me.
Turned out just fine without a doula, I went into the hospital to get labor started and was already a 6 when they broke my water. Contractions didn't really get bad until I was at a 9 1/2 and got out of the water to go to the bed.
I did really appreciate having her as a doula for the fact that I called her a lot when I had questions or just needed to vent about being frustrated that labor wasn't starting and I was overdue. She was a fantastic calming person and helped me feel better every time. I think she would have been great in the labor room if I had needed her or if she was available.

Personally I think it's a good idea.
At the least, I would look into having a water birth, laboring in water really helped and I would think birthing in water would be good too. I didn't have that option but I wanted to do it.

melissalaw August 22nd, 2013 08:26 AM

Re: Doula
Where I am delivering they let you labor in water but they no longer allow water births. I think they just stopped them this year. I'm not sure why they stopped them. I have heard from several people that laboring in the water really helped.

EverydayJoy August 22nd, 2013 08:59 AM

Re: Doula
That's too bad they don't allow them anymore. At least you can labor in the water.

Ame C August 22nd, 2013 12:29 PM

Re: Doula
No doula here, but if it was in our budget I think I would really enjoy having one. I was thinking it would be nice to have someone in the delivery room to coach me during labor. My first labor was intense and a very painful pain med free birth. The pushing part wasn't bad, but the transitional labor contractions were EVIL! I was induced. I don't remember what they used to induce me but I was told it was stronger than pitocin. I honestly think the contractions wouldn't have hurt "as bad" if I hadn't been induced. The nurse that came in and out of my room would tell me how to breath because she was worried I was going to black out from my crazy breathing. I think it would be nice to have someone in there helping me keep my breathing under control. As of right now we can't really afford it.

AnnaBonana August 22nd, 2013 06:32 PM

Re: Doula
I will probably Have one. I'm not sure what the cost is around here but I feel like its really important. I'm also not really sure what our doula budget is, though. Sigh.

I have a friend who had one and she said she wouldn't consider giving birth without one.

Ame C August 22nd, 2013 07:28 PM

Re: Doula
Anna, I found one for $500 but she's booked up until way after this baby would be born. I also found another doula for $750 but then DH and I agreed it was something I could live without. We are a 1 income family and trying to save up so we can move, otherwise I would hire one. I've never had a doula but I can imagine they are an awesome support system to have!

AnnaBonana August 22nd, 2013 08:23 PM

Re: Doula
Awesome, thanks for the ballpark price range! When I meet with my midwife I'm going to ask her if she has any recommendations and go,from there.

I did have one person say to me "Isn't that your husband's job?" With regards to,a doula. And I agree that yes, his job is to help and support. However, I almost feel like my DH is going to need support as well! And while DH is wonderful and I do love him.... He doesn't know what a sacrum is, nor does he know how to coach a hysterical woman through transition.

EverydayJoy August 22nd, 2013 11:08 PM

Re: Doula
I think doulas are a great addition to having your husband be your support. A doula can also coach a husband on what he can do to help support his wife. Most men need a little help with that. Plus it can be helpful to have a detached third party to help keep you calm, and they go through lots of training and have lots of tricks up their sleeve to help get you through the pain. Hubbies, while sympathetic to our pain, don't have that training under their belt.

That said--Amy, I did it without a doula and I really didn't miss her. I felt fine doing it on my own and it went well. Sure, it was extremely painful but it wasn't to the point where I couldn't stand it or couldn't handle it. I was able to stay in control and get through it.

melissalaw August 23rd, 2013 06:57 AM

Re: Doula
I think I'm going to look into it and see how much it will cost. Of course DH thinks it's a waste of money but he has agreed that if I want one then it's ok to spend the money.

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