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-   -   Our sad story (https://www.justmommies.com/forums/f275-pregnancy-loss-journals/1504451-our-sad-story.html)

no_more April 2nd, 2009 01:42 PM

Our sad story
Hi, i am new here... i never found the courage to write on any support forum ever before. I am 30 years old and in September 2008 i found out i was pregnant. My husband (at that time, boyfriend) and i were so happy, we couldn't believe it. We stared at those two pink lines for days but decided to keep it to ourselves for a while... as if we knew what will happen. The miracle lasted for about 10 days since we found, after which i started to spot, went to the ER, where they told me the embryo looks smaller than it should, about 1 week behind, no heartbeat visible (i was on week 6)... One week later the spotting reappeared but this time it was more serious, we went back to the ER and they told me i was miscarrying... The sky fell on us, we were devastated and couldn't understand it...still can't after all this time. We don't drink, smoke, i took prenatal vitamins, fed healthy... why did it happen to us? I went through a D&C and the doctor told me we could try again in 6 months. The six months have gone by (where did time fly? i keep thinking two more months and our baby would have been born, I can't help thinking about this :(). But we are scared to try again. I feel perhaps age isn't on my side... But i feel my life would be empty without a child. I could really need some support, we are both scared but both want another baby. But at the same time, can't help but wondering what if it happens again?

..Penelope.. April 2nd, 2009 07:58 PM

Re: Our sad story
I'm so sorry for the loss of your baby :(

Sometimes there just isn't an answer to why.

It's normal to ask, though. And it's normal to think about how far along you would be, and to hurt that much more on your angelversary, and to be afraid to try again.

It's a difficult and scary journey to TTC again after a loss, but if you want a baby, you can't let fear hold you back. There is a forum on Justmommies called Trying to Conceive After Loss, and the support there is wonderful. It's really great here on the Pregnancy Loss forum, too. Feel free to post on the main board, and I hope to see you at TTCAL in the future.

BTW, I'm Penelope, and my DB is J. We lost our first baby at 12 weeks on Feb 7. I had a D&C that day. We're WTTC our second little miracle in July.

Huge *HUGS*

Christina226 August 7th, 2009 09:08 PM

Re: Our sad story
I agree. It's scary to try again, and that's what I'm going through right now since my m/c was only 3 days ago. Although I've had 2 other losses, I tried as soon as possible and got pregnant with dd1. I don't know if it's because I'm older now and see things differently, but it's just hitting me harder and it scares me to get pregnant again, thinking I'll end up with another loss. I also feel as if I'd be replacing my baby when I'm not. I know I would've been due in April, so when April of 2010 rolls around I'm going to be heart-broken.

I understand your feelings and I just want to say hang in there. I know I'm late in replying to this and I'm not even sure this will get to you, but still, I just figure I should write something. G luck to you.

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